Indian Wedding

Bihar, an Eastern state, is one of the very backward regions in India. Though Biharis are generally quite liberal they stick to their traditions in every aspect. They are not inhibited by any artificial pomp and show and they are very proud of the rustic touch of their roots. A real traditional Bihari wedding usually

lasts for a month, but these days Biharis have reduced it to a minimum of five days affair.

Any Hindu Bihari wedding commences with ‘Satyanarayan Katha’, a ‘puja’/prayer performed by the groom’s parents along with the groom, under the guidance of a “Punditji”/priest. All the attending family members should observe fast. The “havan”/sacred fire is given out on the last day when the wedding rituals are completed.

The ritual “Haldi Kutai”, involves groom’s mother and other “suhagins”(ladies not widowed) grinding whole turmeric to a paste that is sent to the bride for the ritual ‘ubtan’.

An auspicious day is fixed for “Cheka”, the engagement ceremony, wherein 5, 7, 9, or 11 members from the groom’s family along with the groom go to the bride’s house with gifts, known as “Chekas” and the bride and groom exchange rings. Another day the bride’s family repeats this ritual for the groom.

In the ritual “Shagun” the bride’s priest, accompanied by her brother, the ‘hajaam’/barber, and four other members takes auspicious gifts for the groom’s family. The bride’s brother applies ‘tilak’/’teeka’ on the groom’s forehead to signify the bride’s family accepting the wedding. The brother brings a lot of pleasantries for the entire groom’s family like vessels, clothes, jewelry etc. Haldi paste, specially made by the bride’s mother, is brought in a silver bowl to be applied on the groom. “Tilak” is the biggest ceremony held by the groom’s party, equivalent to a wedding reception.

“Madva Bandhana”, the making of the wedding “mandap” held separately at both houses must be performed on the same day as the ‘haldi ka din’.

“Lagan Mahurat” is the day selected by the priest to begin all the wedding rituals. This day the bride puts on an old sari and the married ladies of her family smear “uptan’ (a paste of mustard seeds, milk, saffron and turmeric) on her body and hands. After some time the ‘uptan’ is washed off and turmeric paste is applied on her body for a few hours. This ritual is done to the groom as well.

On the wedding morning once again the ‘haldi’/turmeric paste ceremony is performed for the bride and the groom to beautify and purify their bodies after which they are dressed up and decorated for the “Jaimala” ceremony.

“Dhritdhari” and “Matripoojan” are two rituals performed to seek the forgiveness and blessings of the dead ancestors and seek the same from the living elders respectively. The groom’s parents give “paun-pooji” in the form of clothes or cash to the elders for coming and blessing them.

“Silpoha” is a ladies’ ritual, held in the early morning of the wedding day wherein the groom’s mother in her “Chunri”/shawl”, along with her mother-in-law or her husband’s elder brother’s wife (not widows) grinds “akshat” or rice on a flat grinding stone. While grinding they ask the blessings of the Gods and the spirits of the ancestors. Yet another ritual “Imli-Ghutai”, performed by the groom’s maternal uncle and aunt just before the “paricchavan”, is to drive away evil omens and to caution the groom not to indulge in any form of vices. The uncle feeds a betel leaf to the groom, but the groom keeps it between his teeth while his mother takes it and eats it herself to signify that the mother will accept all the evil omens falling on him upon herself.

“Paricchavan” is done by the groom’s mother by showing an “Aarti’ to drive away all the bad omens falling on her son and she puts the ‘Tilak’ on his forehead and blesses him for an auspicious beginning.

Now the groom gets ready for the “Baraat Prasthan”/wedding procession in a decorated car, accompanied by ‘sahwala’/best friend, usually his younger brother. The groom’s car proceeds to the wedding venue followed by music and dancing by family members and friends. At the entrance of the venue the groom’s family members are garlanded by their counterparts from the bride’s side. The groom, seated in the car, is welcomed by the bride’s priest who applies a ‘Tilak’ on his forehead and helps him out of the car. The bride’s father escorts the groom to a decorated chair reserved for him.

The bride is now brought to the wedding altar where she performs an “Aarti” of the groom and the couple exchange garlands. Before the wedding rites the bride’s mother and the other married women hold the “Galsedi” ceremony. The mother carries a plate containing a small lighted lamp, betel leaves and small lumps of cow dung. One by one, all the women heat the betel leaves on the lamp and foments the groom’s face, forehead and eyes at least five times each, using their left hands only. The remaining women, together, throw the lumps of cow dung behind the groom.

The bride’s brother or brother-in-law escorts the groom to the ‘mandap’/altar for “Kangna Bandhana” ceremony for which the bride wears a yellow silk sari with zari/gold borders without any jewelry on her body. The ‘pujari/priest ties the bracelets made of mango leaves, raw cotton thread, colored rice, turmeric and money, on the couple’s right hands. The next four days they have to wear this symbolic bracelet. The barber, present in the ‘mandap’, now cuts the fingernails and toenails of the couple.

In the “kanyadaan” ceremony the bride’s father stretches out his right hand and the mother places her right hand on it. Then the groom keeps his right hand on the top of the mother’s and finally the bride, holding a conch, places her right hand on the groom’s. The priests chant the mantras all the while and this way the parents give away their beloved daughter to the groom securing an assurance that he will take the full responsibility of his wife. After this the groom retires to his room and the bride changes her dress for the”Kanya nirakshan” where she is introduced to the groom’s relatives.

The traditional outfits of a Bihari bride are an expensive fabulous sari and a chic blouse. The dominant colors in the bridal sari are red and yellow. The silk or chiffon sari has enchanting zari embroidery works. The tight-fitting matching blouse enhances the beauty of the sari. She covers her head with the “pallu” of the sari. The bridal jewelry includes “tikli”, a small gold ornament adorning her forehead at the hair parting. Bihari brides prefer jewelry with elaborate designs and gaudy looks. She wears such gold ornaments in every part of her body, such as necklaces around the neck, rings on fingers, ear and nose, lot of bangles on the hands and anklets around ankles. “Bichwa” or toe-ring is a must for Bihari bride.

When the bride, in the wedding sari sent by the groom’s parents, enters the altar the priest seats her beside the groom and chants mantras to purify the couple. The priest conducts all the important ‘pujas’-the “Kuldevta puja”, to invoke all the other Hindu deities and another special ‘puja’, known as the “damad/son-in-law ki ‘puja. The priest then wants the couple to take a series of vows and makes the sun, moon, stars, earth and sky as witnesses to this union of the couple.

The couple takes seven ‘pheras’/circles around the sacred fire, lighted outside the ‘mandap’. As they walk around the fire the bride gently throws into the fire “lave” (roasted husked rice) from a ‘soop’, a 3-sided conical cane basket, she holds while her brother refills the ’soop’ with fresh ‘lava’. After the ‘pheras’ the groom applies sindoor/vermilion powder on the bride’s forehead, starting from the topmost point of her nose to the parting of hair. The groom repeats this minimum five times while the bride’s eyes remain closed through out this act. To attain the marital status, she also wears “taagpaag”/”mangalsutra”-a sacred thread with gold and black beads- around her neck. Now that all the wedding rituals are over and the couple is truly married, the bride and the groom are escorted to the beautifully decorated bridal chamber.

On the fourth day of the wedding, amidst chanting of mantras, the priest removes the bracelets from the right hands of the couple (“Kangna Kholna” ceremony”). The groom takes his new wife to his house after two days or the “kangna kholna” ceremony. After a couple of days, the bride’s brother or brother-in- law invites her and the groom to her parents house to stay for a few days with gifts for the couple and the in-laws and they go back with him carrying return gifts for the bride’s family.

The North-Eastern Indian state, Manipur is blessed with a rich cultural heritage and verdant scenic beauty. The word ‘Manipur’ means the land of gems. This tribal state is famous for its colorful festivals and other traditions. Mostly this land is occupied by tribal folks and these folks spread in the neighboring states as well.

Their weddings are as colorful and spectacular as their traditions. All the tribes follow almost similar rituals with slight variations in the customs and costumes. People of Manipur prefer weddings in their own community, but are not opposed to inter caste marriages outside Manipuri community too.

Among the tribes “Magh”, young men and women select their partners at the grand New Year Festival when they get an opportunity to know each other closely and inform their parents and seek their approval. Young girls from the tribes Garo, Tippra, Khasia and Magh often go to the market to buy and sell goods. The boys and girls use this opportunity to know each other closely, choose their partners and with the consent and blessings of the parents get married. Young men and women of the tribes “Santal”, “Garo” and “Manipuri”, while working in the fields together, come to know and understand each other well and are able to select their life partners.

Manipuri weddings are held according to the customs and traditions. In the starting approach, known as “Hinaba”, the boy’s parents visit the girl’s house and meet her parents. The horoscopes of the boy and the girl are matched. If both the parents agree the nest meeting, termed as “Yathang Thanaga”, is fixed. In this meeting the parents of the girl give their consent for the wedding. In the next ritual, “Waroipot puba”, the boy’s relatives bring food items and finally contract for the wedding is sealed. Then the engagement, known as “Heijapot” is announced among the friends and relatives. The groom’s friends and relatives bring fruits, food and gifts to the bride’s house. The relatives and friends are invited and the Brahmin priest finalizes the wedding date and rituals.

A “Manipuri” wedding party puts up a grand spectacular show, but very little is spent on feasts. Usually a wedding in a “Meitei “house in Imphal, the capital city of Manipur, is attended by not less than thirty cars. When a wedding is attended by a convoy of cars it is considered as a status symbol. The men come in dhoti and kurta and a shawl wrapped around while their women come in pink “fanek” and “chader”.

Manipuris erect beautiful and spacious wedding “Pandals”/sheds in which the bride and groom walk around to be greeted with paddy and “durva” grass. For the reception ceremony, at the entrance a “Meitei” woman offers a “thali” or plate with a banana leaf containing betel nut, betel leaves and “tamul”. Seats are provided around a “Tulsi” platform. In every platform a ‘tulsi’, a sacred plant, is grown over a raised platform around which all the auspicious ceremonies are performed.

The groom is given a warm welcome by lighting a “Pradip” and washing his feet by a young boy accompanied by the singing of “kirtan” and playing of traditional music. “Kirtans” and “shahnai” music are played while the couple completes the seven “pheras”/rounds, the bride taking the steps in a rhythmic style with the music.

One woman from each side releases a pair of “Taki” fish, representing the bride and groom, into the water. If the pair of fish swims side by side it is considered as an auspicious omen. Garos follow a similar ceremony in which a cock and hen with throats cut are left to the ground. If they come together to die it is taken as a good omen. Otherwise, to get rid of ill omen, remedy is done through payer and spell by a “khamal”, the mendicant.

Manipuries offer exceptionally special food to the Gods and other deities on this occasion. These people believe, by pleasing them, the Gods will bless the couple in abundance. On the fifth day after the wedding, the Manipuri bride comes to her parents’ house for the first time. All members of the clan are invited to this ritual and they all participate with gifts such as rice, meat, fowls, pigs, money or alcohol and a prolific feast is served to them.

The costume of a Manipuri bride is very unique; she wears the “Raslila” skirt on her wedding day. “Chakmas” brides wear red and black sarong called “Pindhan” along with a blouse called “silum”. “Magh” bride’s puts on a “thami”/sarong that covers the body from chest to knee over a full-sleeved jacket or choli.

Though a land or gold and gems, the “Maniprri” brides wear only a very limited variety of jewelry. In North Bengal the various tribal women wear almost similar ornaments. “Santal” and “Oraon” tribal women wear jewelry such as necklaces bangles, anklets, nose-rings and earrings. “Oraon” women put up their hair in a peak style and adorn their forehead with a jewelry called “tikli”. Brides of “Chakma” tribes wear necklaces, coin earrings, bangles and anklets. “Garo” brides do their hair style using a bun, adorned with flowers. “Magh” women brighten their faces with a kind of herbal powder or wood paste.

The bridegroom’s costme consists of a white dhoti, kurta and turban. Lower class “Garos”, even today, wear a small piece of cloth, just enough to conceal nudity. In the deep hilly forests the tribasl use leaves as their wedding dress. “Santal” groom’s outfits are called “Panchi”, “Panchatat” and “Matha”. The main wedding dress of the “Chakmas” is a “lungi” worn along with a shirt.

Maithil Brahmins belong to a region called Mithila lying between the lower regions of the Himalaya Mountains and the River Ganges in the North-Eastern India. These people are supposed to be the highest ranking caste and are politically very influential. They celebrate all the important Indian festivals with great enthusiasm and extravaganza. The same spirit and pomp are reflected in their weddings as well.

For a Maithil Brahmin, giving away a girl in marriage is like offering the gift to a God. The parents might love her dearly, but would not keep her in their house for a long time. When the daughter of a family attains the marriageable age her father starts looking for a suitable match for her. Maithil Brahmins take extra care in the process of match making. “Panjikars” or registrars would match the “panjis or horoscopes of the two families and ascertain there exists no blood match between the two families of the boy and girl down five or six generations to avoid any incest.

The Maithil Brahmin brides are dressed in dignified and fabulous traditional Indian saris. Mostly the saris are in red color, other glitzy colors are also in vogue. The bridal sari is either Banarasi silk or any other expensive quality decorated with rich zari works. She is adorned with all the traditional Indian jewelry studded with precious stones, like necklaces, bangles, earrings, nose-rings, toe-rings, rings, anklets etc.

The groom’s attire consists of cultural dhoti and kurta and a customary headgear known as the “pag” in red color. The men in “barati”/wedding procession wear yellow or white “pag”.

Rituals before wedding include “Siddhant” or the match-making wherein the astrologers of both families fix an auspicious date for the wedding after carefully consulting the Maithil “Panchang” or lunar calendar. The “Panjikar/astrologer makes a letter called “Patra” in which the wedding between the girl and the boy is confirmed.

On the wedding day the women of the bride’s house wait for the arrival of the groom at the courtyard. A small “Kalash” or pitcher decorated with “Amra pallav”/mango leaves and “kumkum”/vermilion powder etc and an ox yoke are placed in the center of the courtyard. Men and women, having different ritual responsibilities, wait separately for the groom’s arrival. The women of the bride’s family give a warm reception to the groom while the bride’s assistant, “Vidkari” welcomes the groom by applying sandal paste on his forehead. Then the groom, after bath, changes his “dhoti” and the “jenu”(sacred thread).

Maithil Brahmins follow a strange custom in which the bride seeks the blessings of the ‘dhobi’s or washerman’s wife who dies before her husband and always remains a “suhagin”, one who never becomes a widow. A little bit of yoghurt is touched to the hair of the washerman’s wife and the bride too is given a little yoghurt to eat.

Now, both the bride and groom visit the “Kuldevi” shrine, the lineage Goddess of her family. It is only this moment that the groom ever enters this shrine, In the “Gauri Puja” performed there the bride thanks Goddess Gauri for blessing her with a husband like Lord Shiva. The Goddess is symbolically represented by a betel nut kept on the head of a clay elephant.

“Otangar” is another important ritual in which eight Brahmins pound rice, an indication of the belief that marriage mixes and combines seed or bloodlines joining “patri”-lineages in innovative ways. The groom also participates in the ritual ‘Otangar’.

“Nana Yogin” or Grand mother Yogi is a very popular ritual wherein the women place flowers, betel leaves etc on a tray which is used to make “Aarti” of the groom.

In the actual wedding ceremony the bride and groom sit in front of the sacred flame made of sandalwood and ghee. A Brahmin “Pujari”/priest performs all the wedding rites. In “Kanyadaan” the bride’s father takes the groom’s hands and places his daughter’s hand in them followed by the “Saptapathi” rite wherein the couple makes seven circles around the sacred fire, the seven steps symbolizing the first seven steps of their wedding life.

After the wedding rites the groom applies ‘sindur’/vermilion powder at the parting of the bride’s hair. This ‘sindur’ will remain there as long as her husband lives. “Ghungat” is an interesting ritual in which the groom veils his wife’s head for the first time and her brother unveils her, This indicates the dual lives of a woman, one in her parent’s house and the other-veiled one-in her husband’s place.

In the ritual “Durbakschat”, held on the wedding day or the next day, Brahmin men toss husked rice at the couple wishing them wealth and prosperity. Women, in the ritual “Chumaon”, move a tray containing cultural things over the couple. Such multi-color wedding rites last for four days at the end of which the bride says farewell to her family and friends and leaves for her new house along with her husband.

The “Kayast” or “Kayastha” is a community found in many North Indian states and they follow almost similar customs and rituals in their weddings with slight variations in the ceremonies depending upon the state in which they have been living for many generations.

“Bariksha”, the alliance, is a pre-wedding ritual in which the bride’s people send a silver bowl full of rice, turmeric, and “supari”/betel nut to the groom’s house along with an envelope containing some cash when the parents of the boy and the girl agreed for the wedding between their son and daughter. This ritual acts as a confirmation for the alliance.

As for “Sagai” or formal engagement, the groom’s family members come to the bride’s house with gifts like clothes, jewelry and the engagement ring for the bride. The boy’s mother places the gift items in the bride’s “Kodi”/sari “pallu” and applies “tikka”/vermilion on her forehead.

Haldi and “Tel”/oil bath and beautification rituals signify the purification of the bride’s/groom’s mind, body and soul before entering the path of marriage. The older women of the family apply oil on the bride’s face, arms and legs. “Upton”, a paste made of pure vegetable oils, fresh milk, curds, henna and turmeric is also applied on her face, arms and legs followed by her sisters or cousins taking her for bath. The same ritual is performed for the groom in his house.

In the “Tilak” ceremony, all the bride’s relatives go to the groom’s house with clothes, jewelry, gifts, fruits, sweetmeats and the “tilak” paste made of rice and vermilion. These gift items are placed in the “puja”/prayer room or in front of the family deity and the bride’s family members bless the groom by applying the ‘tilak”/vermilion on his forehead.

Mehendi is a mega event in which professional mehendi artist makes intricate beautiful designs on the hands and feet of the bride using henna paste. In the Uttar Pradesh “Kayasth” community even the groom’s hands are decorated with henna designs. It is a joyous occasion for both the family members to sing, dance and eat,

On the day of the “Bhaat” the bride’s maternal uncle visits her house
with saris, jewelry and other gift items and gives them to his sister and niece. He even hosts a lunch for the groom’s family and gives them gifts.

Now the groom gets ready for the “Baraat”/wedding procession, a very colorful and grand ceremony. He puts on the traditional white and “Achkan”, a long jacket with a Nehru collar and a tight bottom called “Churidars”. He also wears a “safa”/turban and a “kalgi” or brooch is pinned onto it while a sword or dagger is tucked in the waistband. Before he leaves for the wedding venue all his family members apply “tikka”/vermilion on his forehead. The groom uses a beautifully decorated car for the ‘Baraat’ these days.

At the entrance of the wedding venue, groom’s party is given a warm reception by the bride’s people; especially her mother applies a “tikka”/vermilion on the groom’s forehead as a welcome gesture. The bride’s female relatives and friends escort her to the wedding hall and before stepping into the “mantap”/altar the bride and groom exchange garlands. This ritual, known as “Jaimala”, signifies their acceptance of each other as life partner. Now the wedding rites begin with the couple, their parents and the Brahmin “Pujari”/Priest who performs the wedding rites, are seated at the ‘mantap’/altar.

The priest lights the “havan”/sacred fire in the midst of chanting of Vedic mantras. All the auspicious wedding rituals are held in front of “Agni Devta” or God of Fire. The parents of the bride and groom offer “puja”/prayers to Lord Ganesha and other deities; so that the couple can fulfill the aims of life, “Dharma”/duty, “Artha”/worldly prosperity and “Kama”/physical desires. The ‘pujari’/priest, chanting mantras, adds pure ghee or butter, wood and “samaghri”/a mixture of pure butter, grains of rice and herbs, to the holy fire.

In the “Kanyadaan” ceremony, the bride, groom and the bride’s parents stand in front of the fire. The parents of the bride join their left hands while the groom keeps his right hand over theirs and the bride then keeps her right hand over the groom’s right hand. Now the parents lock their right palms and keep them over the couple’s hands. At this moment the bride’s father asks the groom whether he is prepared to accept his daughter as his wife and whether he will discharge the duties of a responsible husband. The groom accepts and the parents give away their daughter to him by chanting the names of the fathers and forefathers of both families.

After ‘kanyadaan’, end of the groom’s scarf is tied to the bride’s sari pallu “or “dupatta”/veil. This marital knot signifies the coming together of the couple. Next ritual is the promises made between the bride and the groom sitting in front of the; havan;/sacred fire followed by the couple making seven pheras/circles around the fire and taking their seven wedding vows. In the first three pheras, the bride walks first around the fire while during the next four pheras the groom leads her. The “Pujari”/priest continues with recital of the mantras and offering “samaghri” to the fire all through the pheras.

The most touching ceremony, “Bidaai” or the bridal send off is filled with emotionally charged moments when the bride bids tearful farewell to her family and friends. She begins her journey to the new house in a decorated car along with her life partner and her brother or any male relative from her family.

At the entrance of her new house, the bride’s mother-in-law receives her by performing the traditional “Aarti” and leads her to the family “Puja”/prayer room where she is seated in front of family deity. Finally she sits in a room, her head uncovered, when the relatives come and get acquainted with her and give lovely GIFTS.

Though Buddhism originated in India the pomp and gaiety usually found in Indian weddings are missing in Buddhist weddings. The weddings are very simple, devoid of any complex rites or rituals. The most welcome part about these weddings is that they are less inclined on religion, but more on faith. Even though the wedding is short, lacks colorful and interesting rituals, it will surely be a wonderful, memorable experience for the participant.

There are two parts in a typical Buddhist wedding, one is Buddhist component, offering prayers and gifts to the monks and the Buddha image and the other is non-Buddhist component, having traditional practices observed by the families of the couple.

In the Buddhist religion either the parents or the boy himself will select the prospective bride. After selecting a particular girl, a family friend is sent to the girl’s house with a bottle of whisky and a “Khada”, a white silk scarf, to offer. This type of visit called “Khachang” is to know whether the girl’s people show any inclination to the alliance. If they agree both the family members meet and compare “kikas”/horoscopes to set a good date for the formal engagement known as “Nangchang”. Tradition insists that the boy gives a gift to his would-be wife; the gift might be even as big as a land. The colors of the wedding costume of the bride and the groom is also decided by comparing the horoscopes, the preferred colors being red and gold.

In the ‘Nangchang’, presided over by a ‘Lama’ or “rimpoche”, the maternal uncles of both families play significant roles in the marriage negotiations. The bride’s maternal uncle is made to sit on an elevated platform and the priest recites prayers and distributes a holy drink, “madyan” to all present followed by fixing the wedding date after consultation with the astrologer. The uncle and siblings have important roles on the boy’s side while the whole family, friends and the uncle join the occasion on the girl’s side. A suitable day for the girl’s departure from her parent’s house is also decided at this moment.

The Buddhist wedding ceremony is usually conducted in a temple or Buddhist shrine. The bride is seen in a costume called “Bhaku”that is made of brocade and almost similar to a sarong, but it has full length. She wears along with it a sleeved blouse, “Hanju”, made of Chinese silk material called “Khichen”. The other bridal accessories are a special coat and a scarf. The bride wears some strange pieces of jewelry termed as “Khan” made of large precious and semi-precious stones like turquoise, coral, pearl etc. Traditional family brides wear this jewelry around their neck and also on the forehead. Heavy gold bracelets adorn her arms. The jewelry is mostly of pure gold or gold plated. The groom’s attire also consists of a beautiful ‘Bhaku’ made of brocade, the length of which just reaches above the ankles. The “Bhaku” is worn with a waistcoat, “Lajha”. He wears a cap made of brocade and a sash around the waist.

The bride and groom begin the wedding ceremony by bowing in front of the Buddha image, followed by the couple reciting some prayers and chants, the “Tisarana”, “Pancasila” and the “Vandhana” in “Pali”, the Buddhist language. The bride and groom are then, asked to light incense sticks and candles and offer flowers to the image of the Buddha and around it. Now they are told to recite one after the other the vows that are prescribed for each separately in the “Sigilovdd Sutta” (Digha Nikilya). After this the parents or the assembly recite the “Mangala Sutta” and “Jayamangala Gadha”, their blessings for the newly weds.

The parents of the bride and groom connect them by placing a loop of strings on the couple’s heads. The newly weds offer flowers, food, sweets, medicines etc to the monks. Sometimes, as a token, certain amount of money is also given to the shrine. The priest keeps a thread on the heads of the monks and recites prayers in ‘Pali” to bless the newly wedded couple with an everlasting happy and healthy married life. The string is attached to a container that will be purified after the wedding. A red paste is also applied to the couple’s foreheads.

As for the bride’s departed ceremony it is often seen the couple opting to stay in the bride’s house or she can leave her parent’s house for her husband’s place any day within the ten days after the wedding or they could even stay separately away from their families.

Buddhist weddings are not very formal, but their form has undergone a lot of changes. Initially monks never used to attend the weddings, but in recent weddings the monks play a significant and profound role. All the wedding rituals will be over within half an hour. Even though the wedding process is simple and short the invitees have loads of enjoyment during the wedding ceremony. After the wedding ceremony the couple and the guests proceed to the reception.

Some unique customs mark the Buddhist weddings. When the boy’s people arrive at the girl’s house they are given a strange welcome. It is their custom that a pot of water, flowers, bamboo sticks are arranged in a typical manner and the entrance is decorated with leaves for good luck. The girl’s sisters give a prickly welcome to the boy and his friends by throwing nettle leaves, thorns etc on them. The groom denies entry into the hall till he gives them suitable presents or money.

Parsi community migrated to India about 1000 years back and settled down in Mumbai, the commercial capital. Now they are facing the threat of extinction. Parsi “Lagan” or wedding is filled with certain vibrant and interesting rituals and customs that extend for a couple of days. One can enjoy the rich Parsi culture from the time of engagement till the elaborate post-wedding reception in the form of excellent music, drinks and dinner. In a Parsi wedding various colorful and fun-filled pre-wedding rituals could be seen.

In the ritual “Rupia Peravanu”, an informal engagement, both the families confirm the acceptance of the marriage alliance. Women from the groom’s side make a visit to the bride’s house with silver coins for the bride as gift. The groom’s people are welcomed by the bride’s mother at the doorstep and she conducts the “Achoo meecho” to ward off the evil eye. Another day the bride’s family make a return visit to the groom’s house with more coins and the same ritual takes place again.

Another interesting ceremony, “Madhavsaro” is conducted four days prior to the wedding when the two families each plant a small tree, usually a mango plant, supposed to be a symbol of fertility, in a pot with chanting of prayers by priests. These pots are kept at the entrance of their houses. The soil in the pots is mixed with three types of metal chips such as gold, silver etc, “paan’’/betel leaf, ‘supari’/betel nut, turmeric and dry dates. Every morning the plant is watered and on the eighth day after the wedding it is transplanted somewhere else.

Another ritual known as “Adarni” is held on the third day before the wedding. In this ritual the groom’s people come to the bride’s house with gifts like clothes and jewelry for her. This custom is repeated in the groom’s house as well.

“Supra nu Murat”, a ritual almost similar to the Hindu Haldi ceremony and performed a day prior to the wedding, has four married women each given a ‘supra’ containing auspicious things like betel leaf, betel nut, turmeric, dates and a piece of coconut. Traditional songs are sung and the women exchange the ‘supras’ seven times cross-wise, length-wise and breadth-wise with a fifth lady sitting in the centre carrying “Khalbatto” and dry turmeric. When the passing of the ‘supras’ is over all the five jointly beat the turmeric in the pestle adding some milk. Then the women apply this paste to the bride and groom and shower blessing on them.

Before the wedding ceremony, “nahan” ritual is done for purifying the body and soul of the bride and groom. By giving a symbolic bath the family “dastur” purifies the couple. Tradition insists that the bride and groom, after the ‘nahan’ ritual, are not allowed to touch any one outside the family or caste. The bride puts on her wedding costume “Madhavate”, a costly, embellished white sari and a white tight-fitting blouse given by her parents. Her wrists carry glass, gold or jeweled bangles, especially red glass ones. She wears only very few ornaments like gold necklace, hanging earrings etc. The groom’s costume consists of the traditional Parsi “dagli’ and “feta”, a white garment similar to a ‘kurta’, a black cap and holds a shawl in his hand.

Parsi weddings are usually held at a “baug”/park or at an “Agiary”/The Fire Temple, the auspicious time usually being at 6.40pm. Every staircase and doorway is decorated with chalk or ‘rangoli’ patterns and very large colorful designs are seen even at the entrance of the wedding avenue or ‘baug’/park.

A ritual called “Achu meechu’ is performed before the couple steps on the wedding altar. The bride’s mother begins the ritual with her future son-in-law. She carries a tray containing a raw egg, betel nut, rice, coconut, dates and water. She makes seven circles with the coconut around the groom’s head and breaks it on the floor at his right side. She repeats it with the raw egg and sprinkles water on both sides. Next the groom’s mother conducts the same ritual for her future daughter-in-law.

During the ceremony “Ara Antar” the couple is seated on chairs facing each other, with a cloth held between them; so that they cannot see each other. The senior priest places the bride’s right hand into the groom’s right hand and passes a piece of cloth that encloses the couple’s chairs in a circle. He then ties the ends of the cloth with a knot, known as the ‘wedding knot’ The priest, then, fastens the couple’s right hands with a ‘raw twist’ that he passes around the hands seven times after which he passes the same raw twist around the bride and groom seven times and finally circles around the wedding knot of the cloth seven times. When this ritual ends the servant carrying the fire-vase puts the frankincense on the fire and immediately the cloth held between the couple is dropped down and the couple throws grains of rice kept in their left hands on each other. They believe that the one, who throws first, will be the foremost in loving and respecting the other.

For another ceremony, “Chero Bandhvanu”, the couple sits side by side with the seven strands of thread still circling them and the invitees too sit near to them. “Diyas”/lighted lamps are kept on tables on both sides. The two officiating priests give an hour-long admonitions, benedictions and prayers. The admonitions are followed by benedictions that invoke the “Yazatas”/angels for favors. The prayers are made to invoke the departed souls to bless the couple with some of the great qualities the dead had possessed. Another set of benedictions, “Tandarusti”, is meant to invoke the blessings of God to grant the newly weds good health, strength and a healthy progeny.

Various fun-filled ceremonies follow on completion of the wedding. The sister of the bride extracts money from the groom by playing some tricks on him. In the end the couple goes to the Fire Temple for blessings.

Parsi weddings are famous for their post-wedding receptions in which food, drinks and music flow lavishly throughout the night. The traditional dinner is an elaborate four-course meal comprising delicious food items. All the wedding ceremonies come to an end when the newly weds are escorted home by the bride’s family and ritual ‘achu meechu’ is repeated by the groom’s mother for the couple in togetherness.

Marwaris belong to a region known as Marvar or Jodhpur of the South Western Rajasthan state in Western India. Marvari weddings are celebrated on a grand spectacular manner with pomp and gaiety. Wedding rituals, held only in the traditional way, are very elaborate and stretch for days on end. Matching of horoscopes of the girl and boy is very essential for them and they do it with the help of family astrologers. Marwaris prefer to select the bride and the groom from their own community only.

Pre-wedding ceremonies include “Tika”/engagement that is held in the bride’s house, attended only by the male members of the family. The wedding is confirmed by the bride’s brother applying a “Tilak” or “Bindi” on the groom’s forehead.

In “Griha Shanthi and Ganapathi Sthapana”, held two weeks before the wedding, the family priests install an idol of Lord Ganesha and perform a “Puja”/prayer in both the bride’s and groom’s houses separately. “Pithi dastoor/Ban ceremony is held in both houses wherein a paste of turmeric and sandal is smeared on the bride and groom. During this elaborate ceremony the bride is dressed up in the traditional Rajasthani orange color outfit or “Poshak” after which the bride and groom are banned to leave their houses till the wedding day.

“Mehfils”-entertainments-are performed for men and women folk separately in the evenings. “Dholaks”/small drums are played and women in elaborate dresses dance to the tunes of traditional Marwari wedding songs. The bride and the groom, seated in their respective “mehfils” can participate in the dance occasionally.

In the important ritual “Janev” the groom, in an ascetic outfit, is given the option of accepting the married life or the ascetic life. After wearing the thread, when the groom makes a mock attempt to go for the ascetic, his maternal uncle prevents him and asks him to take up the married life. The bride’s relatives bring the “Palla dastoor” containing the dresses, jewelry and gifts for the groom to wear on the wedding day.

“Mahira Dastoor”, yet another important ceremony, in which the bride’s/groom’s maternal uncle, Mama, arrives at his sister’s house with much fanfare and distributes clothes, jewelry, sweets etc to all the members of the bride’s/groom’s family in a bid to reduce the wedding expenses of his sister.

In the ritual “Nikasi”, the groom wears a “Pagdi”/headgear tied up by his sister’s husband and a “Sehra”/Turban of flowers or pearls is attached to the ‘pagdi’. The groom’s brother’s wife applies “Kajal” in his eyes. Their custom insists him to visit the temple first before the “Baraat”/wedding procession.

The Marwari groom is seen in the traditional costume “Achkan”, a long coat in golden color and a bottom, “Churidar”. He also wears a saffron color turban and regal shoes. As the ‘baraat’ reaches the bride’s house the groom hits the “toran”, a decoration at the entrance, with a neem stick. This ceremony, “Toranchar” is believed to have the power to ward off any evil eye. Now the bride’s mother extends a warm welcome to the groom by performing the “Aarti” and applying “Tilak” to the groom’s forehead. The groom is taken to the wedding altar where the ritual “Jaimala”, the exchange of garlands between the bride and groom takes place.

The wedding costume of a Marvari bride is a typical expensive Rajasthani “Poshak’ consisting of a ghaghra choli and duppatta embellished with beautiful designs and embroidery made with golden threads. The traditional color of the bridal dress is red, deep yellow, orange or pink. From head to toe she is adorned with jewelry, to mention a few, a circular piece of jewelry, known as “rakhri”, hanging from the forehead at the hair partition, “timaniya”, a type of choker inlaid with uncut diamonds, a set of ivory or gold bangles known as “Chooda”, hanging golden earrings, “Bajubandhi”, gold armlets studded with stones, gold anklets, gold toe-rings known as “bicchiya” and “nath” or nose-ring embedded with stones.

“Grandhi Bandhan” is a Marwari wedding ceremony in which the cloth around the groom’s waist and the bride’s ‘duppatta’ are tied together, symbolizing the union of the bride and the groom. “Paanigrahan” involves the groom taking the bride’s hands in his, signifying their future life together. All the Marwari weddings are held in front of the holy fire and the couple makes four circles around the fire and three at the entrance.

The bride, in the ritual “Ashwahrohan”, places her right foot on a grinding stone which shows the determination of the bride to face the future challenges in her married life boldly and firmly. The bride’s brother, on his part, puts puffed rice in his sister’s hands which she passes to the groom and later is offered to the holy fire, signifying the brother’s concerns and good wishes for his sister.

Next, the groom asks his bride to sit on his left hand side to indicate that he has placed her in his heart. This is a ritual known as “Vamang-Sthapana” and in “Sindurdaan” the groom applies sindoor or vermilion on the partition of her hair followed by the couple taking seven steps together to show that they will take all the future steps together. Both of them take seven vows as well.

The ritual “Aanjhala bharaai” involves the groom’s father who places a bag full of money in the bride’s lap and the bride gives a portion of the money to her husband’s sister and her husband after which the newly weds leave the marriage venue.

In the ritual “Paharavani” the groom is seated on a new cloth for a fun-filled “Sloka”/Poem session. A “tika”/bindi is applied on his forehead. The bride’s female family members ask him to recite poems after which the bride is asked to break an earthen lamp on the “dahaleez”/threshold of the house and leaves for her new house along with her husband. Bidai-in this ritual a coconut is placed under the wheels of the car and the bride who was, till now, in a veil covering her face lifts it for the first time in front of her husband and he in turn makes her happy with a piece of jewelry.
When the couple arrives at the groom’s house, “Grihapravesh” is conducted with various “Pujas”/Prayers. “Pagelagani” is a ritual performed the day after the ‘Grihapravesh” when the bride, still in her veil, is introduced to all the family members who shower her with various gifts. Finally the bride gets rid of her veil.

Pure vegetarian food is served in a Marvari wedding feast.

For Assamese, the people of Assam a North Eastern State in India, wedding is a social occasion and do not try to consider it as a grand gala event. Simplicity and clinging to the age old practices are the essential features of an Assam wedding. Assamese strictly follow the traditions maintained by their ancestors in their weddings and see that all the rituals are fulfilled properly.

The simplicity and elegance of the Assamese weddings make them much more attractive. As in any other Indian Hindu wedding Assam wedding is also classified into three sections, pre, post and wedding ceremonies. The Assamese have elaborate pre-wedding traditions. When a suitable alliance is found the horoscopes of the girl and the boy are exchanged between the two families. They, with the help of the astrologers, fix an auspicious date for the wedding.

In the pre-wedding ritual, “Juran”, as a mark of engagement a new ring is put on the bride’s finger. Assamese custom insists that the bride and the groom should take “Nowani”, ceremonial baths till the wedding day. During the ritual “Pani Tola” women draw water from the river or tank and while they walk in a procession they sing traditional wedding songs.

Assamese wedding ceremony is very simple, but is chic in a way. Assamese hold their wedding reception party before the wedding ceremony. Fish and meat are the prominent delicacies served in the feast. On the wedding day morning both the bride’s and the groom’s mothers go to a nearby river and collect holy water which is used afterwards for the ceremonial baths of the bride and groom in their respective houses.

When the groom’s wedding procession arrives, it is denied entry into the bride’s house until a large sum of money is handed over to the bride’s party. Then the bride’s mother gives a warm welcome to her future son-in-law and the bride’s younger sister washes his feet. The bride’s brother lifts and carries the groom to the wedding altar. The bridegroom is dressed up in the traditional ‘dhoti’ and ‘kurta’ with silk shawl draped across his shoulder.

Meanwhile the bride is given a mixture of curd, ghee, sugar, raw milk and honey known as “Panch-Amrit” to eat. She makes her entry into the altar on the shoulders of her maternal uncles. The bridal costume of an Assamese bride is either the traditional “Mekhla-Chadar or an expensive beautiful sari. ‘Mekhla’ is a lower flowing skirt and ‘chadar’ is the upper wrap. She also wears an upper blouse-like wrap called “Riha” that clings to the body making her more enchanting. The material used for the bridal outfits is “Muga silk” that has a natural golden color and becomes brighter after each wash. Bridal wears ate adorned with gold and silver threads to give her a marvelous getup on this special occasion. The golden jewelry that adorns an Assamese bride has some distinct features. The earrings, ‘Khopo Phod” looks like an orchid, yet another popular one “Lokaporo” has two gold or ruby bird figures joined together back to back. “Jethi poti” is a fabulous necklace having a wide band of cloth, bestowed with a row of small medallions and a beautiful locket at the centre. The large-sized silver bangle/bracelet coated with gold is known as “Gaam Kharu”.

All the wedding rituals are performed in front of the sacred fire. In the midst of chanting of Vedic mantras the bride and groom exchange their flower garlands and take certain vows. People blow conch shells to mark the occasion. The groom decorates his wife’s forehead with “Kumkum”/vermilion. Then one by one the friends and relatives bless the newly weds.

In the post wedding ceremony the couple leaves for the groom’s house where they are extended a warm reception and the groom’s mother performs the traditional “Aarti” to drive away the evil spirits.

Assamese tradition follows a custom in which the people offer prayers to two imaginary demons named “Khoba and “Khubuni” to bless the couple with a peaceful long lasting married life.

The Indo-Aryan language speaking Sindhis are a socio-ethnic group of people originated in Sindh of Pakistan. When British India was divided in 1947 many Sindhi Hindus immigrated to India. Sindhi festivals are many, they celebrate them in the most spectacular manner and their weddings are full of interesting and enjoyable events since they have various colorful rituals and customs. These weddings are based on purely Vedic rites and are conducted on an auspicious day as the “Satyanarayan Chandsi’ or the New moon day. On mutual agreement between the two families, an auspicious date is fixed for the wedding after verifying the horoscopes of the girl and boy. In case they fail to get a suitable date they opt for a “Gudhuro” wedding that is conducted any time after the sunset.

Pre-wedding ritual, “Kachchi Misri”/”Kachcha Shagun” has the bride’s family sending five kilograms of “mithai”/sweets, a basketful of fruits, five coconuts and “Kada Prasad” made from wheat along with some cash to the groom’s house.

The formal engagement “Pakki Mishri,” performed seven days before the wedding, involves the exchange of gold rings between the girl and boy. Bride’s parents send two baskets of fresh and dry fruits, one kilogram of “Mishri”/sugar candy, eleven coconuts, ten kilograms of sweets, ten kilograms of sugar and some cash to the groom’s family. The groom’s clothes and accessories are also sent along with those items. In the ritual “Dev Bithana”, celebrated a few days before the wedding in the houses of the bride and the groom separately, a priest installs a “Chakki” or grinding stone as a totemic deity.

Wedding arrangements begin in the groom’s house with the ritual “Lada”. Traditional wedding songs are sung with the beating of “dholaks”/small drums or plain “thali/plate”. Ten days before the wedding “Berana “ceremony a “Satsang” is performed.

“Tih is a ritual in which the bride’s priest carries a paper containing the “lagan”, auspicious time for the wedding along with a bagful of rice, spices like cardamom, cloves etc, “mishri”/sugar candy and green color silk yarn. “Saanth” ceremony, conducted separately in the houses of the bride and the groom, has married women applying oil on the heads of them. The beginning of a new life is indicated by throwing away the old clothes worn by the bride and groom into the river or the sea. Mehendy ceremony is performed the day prior to the wedding and the henna artist creates beautiful intricate designs on the palms and feet of the bride and the palms of the female relatives and friends by applying henna on them. Sangeet/music ceremony is a time to enjoy with women dancing to the popular hits. “Ghari Puja” is a ritual performed at the houses of the bride and groom for the blessings of their family deities.

The tradition “Saagri” takes place in the evening when the groom’s married sisters and cousins visit the bride’s house. The bride wears a silk sari with their help and they adorn her with jewelry made of mogra flowers. The bride is showered with flowers.

In the important ritual “Janya” the groom wears a yellow thread and the priest, known as “Mehraj” whispers mantras in his ears, a day or two prior to the wedding,

In the “Baraat”/wedding procession the groom, wearing a “Sehra”/turban sits on a decorated mare with the accompaniment of friends and relatives. A music band plays popular songs and people dance to the tunes all the way along the procession. At the entrance of the wedding venue the ‘baraat’ is given a warm welcome by the bride’s family with gifts and ‘sindoor’/vermilion. The groom is escorted to the wedding altar where he and the bride are seated opposite each other, a screen separating them. The groom’s feet are placed on a bronze plate and are washed with fresh milk. Then the priest measures the feet of the bride and groom using a thread hold by the bride. Now the screen is removed and the couple exchanges garlands.

The Sindhi bride looks radiant in her traditional costume, a sari or a lehenga. The red or any other dazzling color wedding costume is very expensive with heavy embroidery, zari works. A matching blouse clings to her body, making her more attractive. She wears matching jewelry that highlights her bridal outfit. A piece of jewelry, known as “mangaltika”, adorns her forehead at the hair parting. She wears gold necklaces/chokers and a lot of bangles, both studded with precious stones or gems. Her gold earrings are either “Jhumka” or any dangling variety, decorated with nine diamonds known as ‘Navaratan”.

The bridegroom’s costume consists of a full-sleeved “kurta”, preferably white or off-white, tight “churidar” and a turban, while in the “baraat”/wedding procession.

In an interesting ritual the right hand palms of both the bride and groom are tied with a thread and the bride’s sari and the groom’s scarf are also tied together. Now the bride and groom make four ‘pheras’/circles around the sacred fire after which the groom keeps the bride’s hand on his forehead. The heads of the couple are held together indicating that hereafter they are one in body, mind and spirit. In “Kanyadaan” the bride’s parents give away their dear daughter to the groom’s parents.

In the post wedding ritual, “Datar”, the bride leaves her parents and arrives at her new house. There she spills milk all around the house. She places some salt on her husband’s hands and he gives it back to her. This action is repeated three times, a reminder for the bride to be as blending and flexible as the salt to the new family members. The ritual “Chhanar” involves the removal of the ‘chakki’/grinding stone, installed as the totemic deity. All the wedding rituals come to an end with the revisit of the newly weds to the bride’s house, the ritual known as “Sataurah”.

Oriya wedding is associated with Orissa, an eastern state in India. The wedding customs and rituals are almost similar to any other Hindu wedding with a few distinct variations. Oriya people are noted for their simple living and modesty; so their weddings do not show much extravaganza. But the most interesting fact about the wedding is that the groom’s mother does not participate in the ceremony.

Brahmins in Orissa conduct their weddings in the day time, preferably in the mornings whereas other communities hold them either in the evenings or in the night only. When a suitable alliance is found, the groom is given a notice/”shagun” to discontinue his search for a bride. The boy’s side is presented with some sweets and cash by the bride’s parents and the girl is also gifted with clothes by the groom’s parents. The horoscopes of the girl and the boy are verified and an auspicious date is fixed for the wedding ceremony,

The pre-wedding rituals commemorate with “Jayee Anukolo ceremony followed by the distribution of invitation cards among the near and dear. The first card is placed before the family deity or the deity at the famous Jagannath temple at Puri. The maternal uncles of the bride and groom receive the second card. The function “Nirbandh”, resembling the engagement ceremony, marks the fathers of the bride and groom taking oath to wed their children to each other.

“Jaregodo Anukolo” is a ritual that entails the stoking of the fire. In the “Mangan” ritual with the blessings of the people, a paste of turmeric and sandal is smeared on the bride’s body followed by her ceremonial bath. “Diya Mangula Puja” is performed at the temple of Goddess Devi wherein the bride’s bangles, toe-rings, sindoor/vermilion and sari are offered by a female barber to Devi.

The bride’s mother, female relatives and friends decorate her with the usual enthusiasm, fun and joy. The traditional costume of the bride in Orissa is an expensive eye-catching sari or lehenga in auspicious colors like red, orange or magenta. The wedding saris are generally made of silk, chiffon, cotton etc with rich embroidery in golden thread or zari works. The selection of the color depends on the complexion of the bride. She is adorned with fine beautiful gold jewelry like stone-studded necklaces, bangles, earrings, nose-rings, anklets etc.

The Oriya groom’s costume includes a “dhoti” and a “Punjabi—a richly embellished garment available in various colors and an “Uttariya”—a scarf-like cloth draped over the shoulders. During the wedding rituals he wears a piece known as “Jor”—a white silk cloth draped around the bare body.

In the custom “Barajatri”, the wedding procession, comprising of the groom and his people, arrives at the entrance of the wedding venue with pomp and gaiety. When the bride is informed of the arrival of the groom she is getting ready to have another sacred bath, known as
“Baadua Pani Gadhua”

The wedding ritual “Kanyadaan” is conducted at the specially constructed structure/altar decorated with flowers and leaves. The priest lights the customary fire and chants Vedic mantras. During the “Saptapadi” ritual, seven heaps made of rice grain symbolizing the seven hills and “Saptakulaparvata” are worshipped. The bride’s father gives away his beloved daughter in the hands of the groom with a promise that he will give proper care and attention to her till the end.
Next, the “Hatha Dhani ritual has the bride and the groom taking “pheras”/circles around the holy fire seven times to the chanting of Vedic mantras and slokas.

While the couple faces each other with her hand over the grooms the bride’s brother who stands behind them puts the “Laja”/puffed rice into them and together the couple offers the “Laja” as “Ahuti” or sacrifice to the God of fire to the chanting of Vedic mantras.

In the “Grihapravesh” ,the post wedding ceremony, the bride bids farewell to her dear parents’ house and proceeds to her new house along with her husband. There she receives a warm welcome from the groom’s family. The rituals end with “Laajahom” wherein rice is spilled on the path of the new couple and the new daughter-in-law kicks a vessel of rice with her right foot to spill the grains on the threshold of her new house. In the “Astha Mangala” ceremony, the couple makes a revisit to the bride’s house where an elaborate mouth-watering feast is served.