Indian Wedding

Dawoodi Bohra, popularly known as Bohri community, an off-shoot of Islam, is found largely in the Indian commercial capital Mumbai and the western state Gujarat. Many of them are well-established businessmen or traders in these regions. The grandeur with which they celebrate their weddings is seen in their elaborate food, lavishly decorated venues and sometimes even in the return gifts for the guests. Though many small customs are not usually incorporated, certain common customs are still followed by all Bohri weddings. Except Nikah, almost all the customs are allowed according to the convenience and means of the respective families.

In the ritual ‘mandvo’, held two days before the wedding, coconut, ‘falool’ (chopped dry fruit) and ‘nazral-maqam (few coins pledged on the name of a specific saint to ward off evil eyes) are placed in a red cloth and its ends are tied in a betel nut. The bride and groom’s paternal and maternal uncles tie this cloth at the entrance of their houses after which the boy and girl must remain in the houses till the wedding day.
‘Manek thamb’ is a ritual where a small thick wooden stick, known as ‘manek thamb, a flower garland and ‘nazral-maqam are kept on a red handkerchief and tied with yellow strings. A young girl, not yet attained her puberty, places it on the right side of the house entrance.

In another ceremony, the beating of the ‘katha’, the ingredients two coconuts, catechu, betel nut, cardamom, turmeric, camphor, chital ‘chini’, red and yellow strings and jasmine oil are brought in a red handkerchief. While the maternal and paternal aunts sit facing each other, the ‘katha ingredients, divided into four equal parts, are kept in a pestle and crushed that is finally thrown away in the mud or a water body. The four relatives are gifted lavishly for participating in this ceremony. This ritual is performed in the two houses separately.
Mosala is a ceremony performed by the maternal uncle (‘mama’) of the bride and groom. The uncle helps the groom to get dressed up, gives him buttons and flower garland and ties the traditional Bohri turban called ‘safa’ on his head. He also helps the groom to wear the shoes. Similarly, the aunt dresses up the bride with ‘lehenga-choli-odhni/dupatta or veil and helps her to put on the sandals. Four relatives, ‘faiji’ or sisters, then symbolically keep ‘mehendi’ sticks on the right palms of the bride and groom. All the family members are gifted by the uncle.
Before the wedding an important function, ‘peralumni’ is held in which the groom’s mother gives gifts including the dress to be worn on the wedding day to the bride. The bride’s people serve sweet drinks to all present.
On a fixed date the bride, groom, her father and two witnesses go to the local ‘maulvi’ to get their marriage registered. Here the bride demands a ‘meher’, an amount that the groom will give to her on the wedding day. This acts as a security for her in case they decide to split in the future.
The ‘Nikah’ is the actual wedding ceremony of the Bohri community. A date is fixed for four male members from the groom’s side to invite the bride’s relatives with gifts. The bride authorizes two of her relatives to act as her witnesses known as ‘wali’. Seeking the willingness of the bride and groom for the wedding is compulsory and so is announcing the ‘meher’, the amount of money, that is to be given to the bride by the groom. While the bride’s father holds the groom’s hand, the officiating priest reads the ‘Nikah’ and recites verses of solemnization. These three are the most important rituals for the solemnization of the ‘Nikah’.
The Bohri bridal outfit is a rich ‘ghaghra-choli or ‘lehenga-choli with a matching veil known as ‘dupatta’. She looks enchanting in the ghaghra suit with its pleasing colors and elaborate designs and embellishments. She has lovely intricate henna/’mehendi’ designs on her palms and feet and she wears dazzling fine gold necklaces around her neck, bangles on her wrists and dangling earrings. She is also adorned with nose-ring, anklets and toe-rings. The richly embroidered ‘rida’, the colorful version of the traditional black Muslim outfit, ‘niqab’, also finds a place in her wedding trousseau.
The groom’s dress consists of the traditional white pyjama-kurta and ‘saya, a long flowing white overcoat. He wears a stitched turban known as ‘Pheta’ with ‘sarpeck (a decorative feather stick) at its top. He also wears a religious locket called ‘takhti’ and a pearl/flower garland. His left hand is covered with an unstitched piece of embroidered zari cloth interwoven with velvet known as ‘dushala’ and a ‘bazzo bandh’ (a round piece of maroon velvet cloth with the names of the five holiest saints of Bohris called ‘Panjatan Pak) is tied on the right arm.
After the wedding/’Nikah, the ‘meher’ amount is given to the ‘wali’, the guardian of the bride. Two members from the groom’ side approach the bride with the ‘toran’ that consists of ‘misri’ (a sweetmeat), coconut, betel leaves, seven full pieces of betel nuts, flower garment, rich clothing and gold jewelry and give it to her. These two persons are gifted in return by the bride’s people.
Another important ritual is the ‘Salaam’ where the couple pays respect to elders by kissing their hands. They perform this to their mothers-in-law symbolizing that they accept them as one’s own mother. The mothers-in-law offer rich return gifts to them. When the bride performs ‘Salaam’ to her mother-in-law she holds a red cloth with one corner wrapped and tied with one silver coin, some amount of money , a coconut and two full pieces of betel nut.
Before the wedding feasts hosted by both sides, a religious meeting of ladies, ‘majlis’, and that of men, ‘darees’ are conducted to invoke the Almighty’s presence in every event. At the venue of the reception, the bride is received by her mother-in-law with ‘pannu’, a decorative basket that contains two coconuts, two flower garlands, little rice, pan-betel nut, one set of expensive dress, a necklace, sweets and a gift for the best bride’s maid even. A pair of sandals is kept beside the basket for the bride to wear to her husband’s house.

Jat community is spread over the northern regions like Uttar Pradesh, Punjab, Haryana, Rajasthan and Gujarat that are regarded as the wealthiest states in India. Though basically agriculturists, they hold very high positions in all the fields and enjoy tremendous political influence. Yet all Jats show the highest respect and love for the soil they cultivate and to the elders as well.

The Jat community approves weddings only within their own community. Moreover, boys and girls of the same ‘gotra’ (ancestral lineage), weddings within the same village and the same ‘Gohand’ are prohibited and discouraged. Following these systems strictly, racial purity is maintained.
The Jat wedding is commenced with a function called ‘chak puja’ in which the Jat people worship the potter’s wheel. This custom is carried out by generation after generation. The weddings are always performed in the bride’s house only. For this purpose a ‘chadve’ or canopy, made of cloth and with four pillars, is erected wherein all the wedding rites are held. The bride’s maternal uncles bring lots of gifts for her mother in a ritual called ‘Bhat Mayero’.

’Dat’ is a ritual in which the bride’s party offers utensils, clothes, jewels etc to the groom and his relatives. Before the wedding day, all relatives and villagers are invited by the groom’s people for a lunch in which ‘Khichdi’, a recipe made of rice and a pulse known as ‘daal’ is served.
The ritual ‘Mugdala’ is held prior to the wedding rites where green and dried twigs of a tree called ‘khejri are brought from the farm in a cart and are worshipped by mother/sister of the bride or groom.
The wedding procession, known as ‘baraat’ with the groom in all his finery and accompanied by his close relatives and friends arrives at the bride’s house in a decorated car. He is accorded a warm welcome by the bride’s people at the entrance. During wedding, the bride’s side offers a royal breakfast to the groom and his close associates. This ceremony is termed as ‘Kanwar Kaleva’.
Then the bride and the groom are escorted to the wedding ‘mandap’/canopy and the ‘Pandit’ or priest, after conducting a ‘puja’/prayer to Lord Ganesha, places a coin and henna on the groom’s right palm on the round empty spot where no henna was applied and ties it with the bride’s hand (Hathlewa). This ‘puja’ could also be performed in advance on an auspicious date and time.
Next in the ritual ‘Ganjoda’ the priest ties the ends of the groom’s dhoti or ‘kurta’ and the bride’s sari or ‘dupatta’/shawl together; the knot signifies the sacred wedlock. Then the couple walks round the sacred fire seven times (‘satphere’) taking seven vows they have to fulfill in the married life after which they are formally recognized as husband and wife.
In the ‘Kanyadaan’ ceremony the bride’s father, before a large invitees, pours out holy water that symbolizes the giving away of his daughter to the groom. The groom recites Vedic hymns to the God of love, ‘Kama’, to bless him with pure love for his wife. The bride’s father asks a promise from the groom that he should help his wife to realize the three ends: ‘dharma’ (duty), ‘artha’ (wealth) and ‘kama’ (love) and the groom makes the promise by saying it three times.
The ritual ‘Vidai’ consists of the emotional send off of the bride to her husband’s house in a decorated car by her relatives and friends who bless her with gifts. The male members of her family apply ‘tilak’ (vermilion mark) on the groom’s forehead and give him gifts. Before entering the groom’s house his sister or paternal aunt shows an earthen pot containing a mixture of salt and water to drive away evil spirits from the groom after which the pot is thrown away and destroyed. At the entrance the bride is welcomed by her mother-in-law with the traditional ‘aarti’ and the bride places her right foot in a tray of vermilion powder mixed in milk or water that symbolizes the arrival of good fortune and purity and then with that leg she kicks over a vessel containing coins and rice to indicate the arrival of wealth and prosperity into her new house. The new arrival is then introduced to the members of the groom’s family one after another who shower her with gifts.
‘ Kankad dorada’ is another ritual that deals with the removal of the sacred threads tied on the wrists of the couple during the wedding and leaving them at the boundary of the groom’s place on his return to his house with his wife after the wedding.
A Jat wedding is celebrated with numerous colorful and unique rites and rituals. Certain features are attached only with this community, to mention a few:
Each important function is accompanied with a particular song, eg, ‘Jakhdi’ is a song sung to receive the husbands of their daughters, ‘Badhawa’,-sung when the daughter is sent to her husband’s house, ‘Ankhadli’,-daughter’ husband comes to his in-law’s house for the first time, etc. ‘Jhunwari’-a relative is respected by applying ‘tilak’/vermilion on forehead and offering gifts. ‘Ratijka-All the family members spend the whole wedding night singing, dancing and worshipping deities.
The traditional functions like ‘mehendi’/henna and ‘pithi are celebrated as done in most of the North Indian communities. The wedding procession, ‘baraat’ is also performed with the usual fun and frolic.

‘A UP Jat bride’s costume includes an expensive bright color silk sari decorated with elaborate zari work and a tight-fitting matching blouse or a gorgeous designer lehenga-choli and dupatta (shawl or veil). Dazzling heavy jewels adorn her neck, wrists and ears. These intricately designed ornaments are usually inlaid with precious or semi-precious stones. She also wears beautiful nose-rings, anklets and toe-rings. Gold and silver are used to make these jewels.
Groom’s outfit consists of dhoti-kurta or pyjama-kurta, a cotton or woolen shawl, a white cap and jooties (shoes). The turban has a ‘sarpech’, a masculine ornament fitted on to it and a jeweled sword is fixed in his waistband. Jat men are fond of wearing ornaments and the grooms are no exception.

Gadulia Lohars, a tribe from Rajasthan state in North India, are wandering blacksmiths that live in close-knit communities and travel from village to village and even to the outskirts of big cities to set up camp for short periods. They got the name ‘Gadulia’ from their attractive bullock carts known as ‘gadis’. Their traditional profession is iron smithy or ‘loha’ in Hindi language that is why they are known as ‘Lohars. These lohars or ironsmiths spend their time as mobile markets to meet the requirements of the far-flung villages and also to the well-connected cities and towns.

These ‘Lohars’ are supposed to be the highest among all the nomadic tribes of Rajasthan. Major decisions and suggestions are generally taken in groups by the elder members of the community, especially regarding weddings they take the advice and instructions from the elders. Child marriages are very common among this tribe, like the Rajputs.

For the nomadic tribe Gadulia Lohars, a wedding is one of the most auspicious ceremonies in the family. Normally, matches are decided even at the time of birth. When the boy and girl grow and attain maturity the date for their wedding is fixed with the help of a Brahmin who selects the correct ‘muhurat’ or auspicious time. It is their custom to demand bride price from the groom by the girl’s father. In the usual course, the elders of the community take a decision on this matter too. When both families agree to all terms nine knots are made on a thread and each day a single knot is untied from the ninth day prior to the wedding date. In this community the bridegroom is referred to as ‘lada’ and the bride as ‘ladi’.

Five days before the wedding, the brother and sister-in-law of the bride and groom go to the village potter wearing the wedding dress. They buy a clay idol of Lord Ganesha called ‘Banyatha’ and an earthen pot known as ‘kalas’ from the potter. These two items are placed near their carts. Neem leaves are kept over the earthen pot while grounded turmeric is placed inside it. The turmeric is smeared on the bodies of the lada and the ladi on the fifth day prior to the wedding. From this day, prayers are offered to ‘Banyatha’ or Ganesha in the mornings and evenings at the respective places of the bride and groom.
A wedding procession (baraat) is taken out on the wedding day with a palanquin known as ‘doli’ in the lead and the men and women of Gadulia sing and dance and take part in the grand feast where ‘roti’, mutton and drinks are the main items. In a very simple ceremony the wedding is conducted by the Brahmins with the traditional Hindu rituals.

The dress and jewelry the Lohars wear are similar to the Rajputs. They dress like the simple rural folk style of Rajasthan. The groom’ costumes include a collarless jacket known as ‘jhavi’ or ‘angarkhi’, ‘potia’, a colorful headgear designed with dots and flower motifs and ‘dhoti’, the lower garment. His shoes are hand-stitched known as ‘nagra jooti’.

For Gadulia women jewels are a symbol of their lifestyle and they wear them fancifully. The bride wears the jewels on her hair, nose, ear, neck, upper arms and feet. From the shoulder joint up to the elbow the upper arms are decorated with big bangles, usually of ivory or silver. She wears glass bangles known as ‘churis’ on the wrists. On the hair she has a finely designed silver pendant called ‘tickli’ that is stringed on the head.
Thus simplicity prevails over the life of the nomadic tribe of Gadulia Lohars of Rajasthan with a simple lifestyle, simple costumes and jewelry and above all, very simple weddings and wedding rituals.

Although Gujarat, a western Indian state, is the home of the Naagar Brahmins several Naagar families are settled in Uttar Pradesh, West Bengal and Punjab. An advanced community, their girls are often married off without any expectations of wealth from the groom’s side. This custom is termed as ‘kanku kanya’ which means that the bride is welcome even if she arrives only with a vermilion mark on her forehead.

The acceptance of the alliance between the two families is announced by applying vermilion mark, known as ‘chandlo’, on the foreheads of the girl and the boy after fixing the matrimonial alliance, but before the wedding date is fixed. The officiating priest/’pujari’ applies the ‘chandlo’ on the foreheads and blesses the boy and the girl after which they exchange garlands and the two families also exchange gifts given for the boy and girl.

All the wedding rituals and festivities are commenced with the Ganesh ‘puja’/prayer known as ‘Ganesh Sthapan’ in which the priest invokes the blessings of Lord Ganesha. The maternal aunts called ‘phois’ perform this ‘puja’/prayer for which they receive splendid gifts.

Naagar wedding is a colorful affair with the Gujarati folk dance ‘Gabra ras’ capturing the essence of celebration. This graceful dance is performed in large circles by ladies singing and dancing to the beat of drums known as ‘dhols’. The men too participate in a rhythmic dance called ‘dandia raas’ performed with sticks known as ‘dandias’. The ‘Garba’, usually begun after 8 in the evening continues up until midnight.

The beautification ritual ‘Pithi’, held simultaneously in both houses prepares the bride and groom for the nuptials. ‘Pithi’ is a paste prepared by mixing turmeric, sandalwood powder, aromatic oils, herbs and rose water. The family members apply this paste on the faces, arms and legs of the bride and groom.

Building the canopy for conducting the wedding rites carries a tremendous religious significance since both the parents seek the blessings and permission of Mother Earth to start the digging of the ground to erect the ‘mandva’mandap’ (platform for the wedding rites covered with a canopy). The priest performs this ceremony by erecting a pole that symbolizes the consecration of the ‘mandva’ which is followed immediately by ‘Griha Shanti’, a ritual held to seek the blessings of the nine planets.

Another important feature of Naagar wedding is ‘Mosaalu’, brought by
‘mama’, the maternal uncle of the bride, one day prior to the wedding. The ‘mosaalu’ consists of clothes, jewelry and a colorful basket with some more gift items like the traditional ‘paanetar’-a silk wedding sari usually white with red border and ivory bangles known as ‘choodo’ (now acrylic or plastic ones).
The wedding ceremony, ‘Lagna’ commences with ‘Varghodo’ (groom’s procession) wherein the groom, splendidly dressed, and accompanied by his close family members and friends proceeds to the bride’s residence on the traditional decorated mare (now replaced by a car). His sister, seated beside him, continuously jingles the ‘looni’ (a small steel bowl filled with betel nuts) near his ear to keep him alert about what is happening around him.
At the wedding venue the bride’s people greet him with the traditional ‘aarti’ welcome.
In the ritual ‘Varmala’, the bride’s mother receives the groom with an ‘aarti’ and ‘poorkhana’, four small sticks while the bride is escorted to welcome the groom by garlanding him and he reciprocates it. The bride goes back to her room and the groom is taken to the ‘mandap’. Meanwhile the priest starts the wedding rites with the bride’s parents who sit around the sacred fire.
Mangalastak is a series of four-lined verses with eight stanzas that glorify Lord Ganesha and ask for the well-being of the couple. This singing of the ‘mangalastak’ forms an integral part of weddings in the Naagar community.

Before the ‘Kanyadaan’ ceremony the bride’s parents have to renew their own marriage vows. Now the bride in all her finery enters the ‘mandap’, accompanied by her maternal uncle (‘mama’) and sits opposite the groom on a ‘paatla/aasan’ (a low stool). In the ‘Kanyadaan’ ceremony her parents place her hands into those of the groom’s.
The Naagar bride is seen in an expensive silk sari, preferable color being red and highlighted by a matching blouse that clings to the body and traditional gold jewelry. This gorgeous sari is worn in their typical Gujarati style. But more and more modern brides go fore stylish chic-looking designer lehengas available in various shades. The beautiful set of gold jewelry she wears includes ‘mang-tika along the hair parting, a large circular nose-ring with a chain hooked into the hair, necklaces and gold and glass bangles studded with precious and semi-precious stones, large dangling earrings and anklets known as ‘payal’. The traditional wear of the groom is ‘dhoti-kurta’; however a shift towards the designer pyjamas-kurta is visible among modern grooms.
In the ‘hasthamilap’ ceremony, the couple’s hands are tied with a cloth that represents a symbolic marital knot. In this posture they take vows to honor their commitment to each other followed immediately by ‘pheras’ wherein the newly weds circle the sacred fire seven times, once again taking the marital vows. They take a vow at the beginning of each ‘parikrama’ or circumvention. Then the formal announcement of their marital status is made after which the wedding ceremony ends up with the groom tying the ‘mangalsutra around the bride’s neck. Then they leave the ‘mandap’ to receive blessings from the elders by touching their feet.

Lastly, the bride takes leave of her parental house in a ‘doli’ or palanquin, these days replaced by a decorated car, to her ‘sasural’ (in-law’s house). An auspicious time is selected for this ‘vidai’ ceremony and before leaving the couple applies wet vermilion on their palms and makes imprints either on the outside wall of the house or near the ‘Ganesha Sthapan’. Her brother presents her with a shawl which she wears throughout her journey to the new house.

The Vokaliga community of Karnataka, a southern state in India, consists of mainly agriculturists and landowners. Therefore many of their wedding rituals follow the rural traditions strictly. But like several other communities, the Vokaligas have adapted these rural traditions to the urban ones and mostly their weddings are now conducted in wedding halls.

On the ‘Nischitartha’ or engagement day elders from the groom’s family go to the bride’s house with auspicious items like jaggery, rice, betel leaves, nuts and an old jewelry on a copper platter for the bride. After consulting an astrologer an auspicious date is fixed for the wedding upon mutual agreement. This function is performed in the absence of the boy and girl. When the groom’s people depart the bride is seated on ‘hasemane’ (wooden stool) to receive the gift items just brought by the groom’s party in her sari ‘pallu’.
In the ritual ‘Chapparashastra/achandi’ held one day prior to the wedding, a ‘mandap’ or canopy also known as ‘chappara’ is erected in the courtyard or in front of the bride’s house with great pomp and care. Traditional musical instruments like drum, trumpet-like instrument ‘halege’ and ‘shruti’-a type of harmonium –are placed in a row at the central point of the canopy. All females of the bride’s group place a banana leaf, betel leaf, jaggery and a sweetmeat called ‘thanbitu’ next to each instrument and bless them after which they conduct a ‘puja’/prayer by applying milk, vermilion and flowers to these instruments and also an ‘aarti’. This ritual called the ‘chapparashastra’ is performed on all days except Tuesdays and Saturdays. The officiating priest sprinkles sacred water on the house and the ‘chappara’/canopy’ to bless the entire proceedings. The same ceremony is held in the groom’s house as well. Then the bride and the groom are taken to their family temples respectively to offer prayers. On return the bride sits on the ‘hasemane’/wooden stool while the elders make small white bundles that contain coins in various denominations. Each bundle is assigned a purpose and hung up in front of the house. This ritual is performed to invoke the blessings of all the deities to ensure the smooth going of all the wedding ceremonies.
‘Kelneeru’ is a unique ritual in which the bride sits on a small stool wearing an old sari and all the ladies anoint her body with a paste of turmeric and coconut oil. After bath three or five ladies take her to a well or pond closely where the bride conducts the ‘Ganga Puja’, a prayer’ to purify the water. The ladies then fill tiny earthen pots with this purified water and take them to the house. There they offer ‘Gau puja’, a prayer for the cow that are fed with rice and jaggery and later perform ‘Tulsi Puja’ too. These ladies also plant a jackfruit sapling along with ‘navratna’ stones (9 semi-precious stones).
Other womenfolk in the house wash the feet of these ladies, bless the earthen pots containing holy water and place them in ‘puja’/prayer rooms with reverence. A similar ritual with a difference is held in the groom’s house also. They prepare two baskets known as ‘kuke shastra’-one contains silver items, gold jewelry and saris and the other rice, jaggery, nuts and coconuts, ready for the next day. The bride and the groom receive blessings and gifts from the elders on this occasion.
‘Varapuja’ marks the welcome accorded to the groom when he arrives at the bride’s residence in all his splendor with the ‘kuke shastra’ and the ‘mangalsutra’ (a yellow thread or a gold chain with a small gold pendant strung to it). The bride’s father receives him with a diamond ring and a gold chain and feeds him with honey and ‘ghee’ (clarified butter).After performing the traditional ‘aarti’ on him, the groom is escorted to the wedding ‘mandap’/canopy.

Now the wedding ceremony known as ‘Lagna’ begins and the bride enters the ‘mandap’/canopy accompanied by her maternal uncle. The bride and the groom stand opposite each other and are separated by a screen known as ‘antrapate’, a white silk sheet. They sprinkle ‘jeera’ (cumin seeds) and jaggery on each other while the ‘pujaris’ chant Vedic mantras.

The bride usually wears a traditional off-white ‘navari’ sari, (a nine yard sari) with a red border and zari works on it. This gorgeous sari is highlighted by a chic matching ‘choli/blouse’ and fine traditional gold jewelry in varied designs. The head is adorned with the trinkets like ‘mang-tika’ along the hair parting, ‘surya’ and ‘chandra’ on the sides of it and ‘moggu jade’ along the plaited hair. She wears ‘jimki’ (a circular piece embellished with pearls and stones) on her ears and necklaces, such as ‘kasinsara’ made of small gold coins with figure of Goddess ‘Laxmi’ on them and ‘addige’, a 2-3 layered thick chain with ruby-studded pendants around the neck. ‘Mangalasutra’ known as ‘karimani’ consists of alternate black and gold beads with two ‘mangalya’ pendants. She has gold and green glass bangles on her hands, ‘oddiyana’-waist band, a gold band worn on the ‘choli’ sleeves known as ‘baji/ bandh and ‘kaladdige’, thick rounded gold or silver anklets.
The groom’s outfit consists of silk ‘veshti’/dhoti, edged with ‘zari’ border, worn in the traditional style and white ‘maguta’, a shirt-like silk top. He also wears ‘valli/pitambar’, a long cloth of the same material as the dhoti, draped over his shoulders and an ornamental turban of gold embellishment called ‘pheta’. He holds a stick, sanctified in a holy place, in his right hand.

When the curtain is removed the bride and groom exchange garlands. The bride’s parents keep the auspicious ‘mangalsutra’ on a coconut which is taken to all family members and guests for their blessings. This coconut is kept on the bride’s hands and then in the groom’s. This moment is considered as the actual ‘muhurtham’, the moment of union as suggested by the heavenly stars. Now the groom ties the ‘mangalsutra’ around her neck. Tying her sari ‘pallu’ to his ‘shalya’ in the marital knot, the couple makes three circles around the ‘mandap’/canopy. After this they go out to look at the sun that acts as a witness to the wedding.

Some Vokaliga families follow the rituals ‘homa’ (lighting the sacred fire) and ‘Saptapathi’ (taking the seven steps around the fire) as found in any other Hindu wedding. The couple receives blessings from all the elders by touching their feet.

Now the time has arrived for the bride to bid farewell to her family members and friends. When she reaches her husband’s house, she tips over a small measure of rice and enters the house with her right foot first.

All the wedding ceremonies come to an end with an elaborate dinner followed by cocktails hosted by the families to introduce the couple to other members of the community, friends and colleagues.

Marriages alliances among Tamil Chettiars, a progressive community of Tamil Nadu, a state in South India, are traditionally fixed within certain villages. There is absolutely no wonder, therefore, that all Chettiars are related and weddings among first cousins are very common. In fact the first choice for an eligible bachelor would be either his sister’s or maternal uncle’s daughter.

The weddings are elaborately rich and unique in rituals and customs. Through a middle man the bride’s party informs the groom’s people how much gifts or ‘seer’ they are prepared to give to their daughter for her wedding.
Nichayadartham or Engagement
When the groom’s party agrees for the wedding, on an auspicious day ‘Nichayadartham’ or engagement is held in the bride’s house. Two copies of the engagement agreement are written by a ‘pujari’/priest and these are exchanged between the two families. To make the sacred ‘mangalasutra’ known as ‘taali’ in Tamil language the groom’ parents give a part of the gold to the bride’s parents. The priest selects an auspicious date for the wedding.

For fixing the ‘muhurthakal’ for the wedding ‘pandal’ (canopy erected for holding the wedding rites) the person who will build the ‘pandal’ applies turmeric paste and red earth on a bamboo stick and ties a bunch of mango leaves on its top. Ghee (clarified butter) and coral (a semi-precious stone) are kept in a hole dug in the ground. Pouring milk on top of the bamboo stick, it is placed and fixed in the hole. Small cups with pulses are placed in front of the pole and they are allowed to germinate.

The maternal and paternal grandparents of the boy and girl are informed about the alliance by their parents seated on seats made of palm leaves, set on a ‘kolam’ (a decorative design drawn with colored rice flour.

Three days before the wedding, the two families go to their family temples for registering the legal agreement between the families. Then the couple is accepted as a unit of the temple. This registration is commemorated with ash and garlands brought by the temple staff. These garlands are later used for the actual wedding.

In the ritual ‘Padaipu’, also known as ‘koodai akki unnuthal’ ancestors are honored by offering cooked food. ‘Manai Poduthal’ is building the brick platform for the couple to sit on during various wedding rituals. ‘Arasanikkal’ is a decorated bamboo stick erected by the relatives in front of the wedding platform at the bride’s residence. This bamboo stick represents a king’s presence at the wedding. On the wedding morning a traditional lighted lamp is hung from a pole tied horizontally next to the ‘arasanikkal’. It is extinguished only after all the wedding rituals.
‘Mattru Kattuthal’ is creating a cloth ceiling to cover the top of the wedding platform. This provides protection to the couple. Ladies from both families decorate the houses with colorful designs known as ‘kolam’ made of rice flour. Members from groom’s family along with auspicious gifts come to the bride’s place to receive the sacred ‘mangalasutra/taali’. Meanwhile the groom’s maternal uncle adorns his toes with silver rings called ‘minji’.
Family members go to the temples to receive the garlands which are handed over to the bride’s family to use in the wedding rituals. Two elders from the groom’s family make an auspicious necklace for the groom to wear during wedding ceremonies by stringing various pendants together.
Early morning the bride, after bath, is decorated with gold chains and neem leaves are kept on her head, waist, shoulders and feet. These leaves are later taken away by a stick. The bride takes a second bath known as ‘Kanni Neeradal” or virgin bath after the ‘Vinayaka Puja’ conducted by the ‘pujari’/priest. This ritual is known as ‘Pooram Kazhithal. In another interesting ritual ‘Thumbu Pidithal’ the centre of the house is decorated with ‘kolam’-color designs-in the shape of a dome known as ‘gopuram’ to invoke the presence of God.
In a ceremony observed separately in both houses the bride and the groom are adorned with gold jewels. The ‘traditional ‘Azhagu Aarti’ is performed for the groom by his paternal grandmother just before he leaves for the bride’s house. She applies sacred ash on his forehead and bids him farewell.
The groom’s procession, accompanied by the playing of the ‘nadeswaram’, a wind instrument, is taken to a ‘Ganesh Temple’ for prayer before proceeding to the wedding venue. The bride’s people welcome the groom with auspicious gifts and a golden ring kept on a big plate for the groom. The groom’s mother carries the ‘mangalasutra/taali’ along with other gifts for the bride. The bride, accompanied by her paternal aunt, walks upto the groom while her brothers shower flowers on her. She stands on a ‘kolam’ (design on the floor) and her paternal grandmother/aunt performs the customary ‘aarti’ for her.
The bride looks dazzling in a gorgeous Kanjeepuram sari, lavishly decorated with ‘zari works and a chic matching blouse. The sari is too expensive, the color being red, maroon, green, magenta or any other bright ones. From head to toe she wears traditional jewelry, renowned for its breath-taking beauty. Her gold necklaces, bangles and earrings have diamonds, rubies and emeralds intricately set in. Her hair is elaborately adorned with jasmine flowers. The bridegroom’s dress includes a traditional white dhoti and a shirt.
The ‘pujari’ performs ‘Ganesh Puja’ for the bride and groom separately. Then the maternal uncles of the bride and groom tie bracelets known as ‘kappus’ containing a silver coin and a turmeric piece on a red cloth on their right wrists while the elders shower flowers on them. The couple is showered with the sprouted grains from the ‘Arasanikkal’ for a happy and prosperous married life. They receive blessings from the family members and friends who touch them on their shoulders, elbows and wrists with flowers dipped in milk, repeating three times.
Now the auspicious ‘mangalasutra/taali’ is brought in a plate and the elders bless it. The bride, wearing the clothes brought by the groom’s mother, stands on the platform facing east while the groom stands in front of her. After a prayer, the groom applies ash, brought from the temple on his forehead and on the bride too. He then puts the temple garland around her neck. He receives the ‘taali’ from an elder member of the family and ties the first two knots and his sister the third one around the bride’s neck. The ‘taali’ with the three knots are smeared with turmeric and vermilion. The bride keeps coconut and rice on a platter followed by the couple exchanging garlands three times and the blessings of the elders. The bride and the groom make seven circles (saptapathy) around the holy fire with the ‘pujari’/priest chanting marriage rites.
After this the fathers of the newly weds sit in the hall to sign the marriage agreement called ‘Isaivu pidimanam’ made by the priest and the marriage gets its recognition.
The bride is given a ceremonial welcome into her husband’s house either by his sister or mother. For this, seven cups containing turmeric, sacred ash, rice, salt, cotton, fruits, betel leaves and tamarind are placed on a platter. A measure, filled with paddy and a brinjal/betel leaf at its top known as ‘nirai nazi’ and a vessel with a spout filled with water are also kept. The bride stands facing east and the mother or sister touches the cups seven times and applies the sacred ash on her forehead and next on the bride. Repeating this for twenty one times, she gives a betel leaf to the bride and pours water on it.

Then the mother/sister touches the bride’s forehead with the betel leaf, thus welcoming her to the new house. The bride on her part washes her mother-in-law’s feet known as ‘padapuja’, followed by some traditional rituals in the groom’s house, to mention a few, the turmeric bath for the couple, ‘Kulam Vazhum Pillai’, i.e. the bride is entrusted with the household duties and ‘Thumbu Kattudal’-tying of the matrimonial thread around the bride’s neck.

After all the functions, bride’s family hosts a feast known as ‘kaichi uttrudal’ for the groom’s people. To conclude, the bride’s father removes the ‘arasanikkal’ and immerses the sprouted grains covered with a silk cloth in a nearby tank or lake.

Gujarat is a western state in India and its people, popularly known as Gujaratis, are highly business-oriented. The intelligent, hardworking and hospitable Patel’s or Patidars of Gujarat are very ambitious and they spend excessively on occasions like weddings. Their weddings, arranged on a grand scale, are spectacular, bright and colorful. The couple receives a large number of clothes and jewelry as gifts and it is not an exaggeration, the groom is gifted with cash and gold at almost each ceremony.

For Patel community ‘Chandlo Maatli’ is a ceremony to announce the acceptance of the alliance between the families of the boy and the girl and their consent for the wedding. The bride’s father along with four other male members and auspicious items go to the groom’s house and applies ‘chandlo’/’tikka’, a mark with vermilion, on the groom’s forehead and gives him a token sum of money as a gesture of blessing. An auspicious date for the wedding is finalized after consulting with the astrologer present.

Before the commencement of all wedding preparations, Lord Ganesha is invoked for His blessings through a ‘puja’/prayer conducted in both houses simultaneously on an auspicious day for the smooth going of all the wedding ceremonies.
In the female function Mehendi/Henna ceremony the professional ‘mehendiwallis’ or henna artists make fine beautiful designs on the palms and feet of the bride and the ladies gathered by applying henna paste while other ladies dance to the music. In the evening the family members and friends, in traditional outfit, sing and dance to the beat of the drum. The ladies form a circle and dance the graceful ‘garba’ and later men also come to do the energetic ‘dandia raas, a dance form using sticks.
Pre-wedding rituals include ‘Mandva Mahurat’ wherein a wedding canopy is erected on the ground with the blessings of Lord Ganesha. After a brief ‘puja’ in the shrine inside the house the ‘pujari/priest applies ‘tikka’ on the foreheads of five men from the family and then gives them a stick having a ‘nada chari’/red thread wrapped around it. With joined hands the men take this stick to the site of the canopy and erect it on the earth. This stick represents one of the poles that support the ‘mandva’/canopy.
For the beautification ceremony, ‘Pithi’, a shrine with a picture of Lord Ganesha is arranged and the bride sits on a low stool, her palms upturned. Her paternal uncle’s wife, ‘kaaki’, makes ‘pithi’,a paste of sandalwood powder, herbs, rosewater and a perfume, German mogro and places it on a decorated platter to be blessed by the priest. The female relatives apply this paste on the bride’s skin which she keeps till the next ceremony is over. The ‘kaaki’ also conducts a short ceremony called ‘ookarhi nautarvi’ in which she keeps an iron nail, betel nut and an Indian one-rupee coin in a shallow hole dug by the priest to ban the entry of evil spirits to the wedding venue.
A very important religious ceremony, ‘Griha shanty’ is performed on behalf of both sets of parents by the officiating priests who pray to the deities to ensure complete peace and harmony till the end of all the wedding ceremonies. The bride with a coconut sits beside her parents in front of the sacred fire. While the priest conducts the ‘puja’/prayer that may last for two hours she gives the coconut to her parents and they give it to the priest who puts it into the fire as ‘ahuti’ or sacrifice to propagate peace and harmony among the nine planets. Similar ceremonies are performed in the groom’s house as well.
In the custom ‘Mandap Mameru or Mosaalu’ held the day before the wedding ‘the bride’s ‘mama’ or the maternal uncle comes with gifts for his niece; the ‘mameru’ consists of clothes, jewelry and other gifts including the customary ‘paanetar’, a silk wedding sari usually white in color with red border and ‘choodo’-ivory bangles –now replaced by acrylic or plastic.
‘Varghodo’ consists of the groom’s procession on a richly caparisoned mare accompanied by his relatives and friends to the wedding venue on the evening of the wedding. While the groom, dressed in all his finery and holding a’katar’(small dagger) prepares to leave the priest gives his sister a small bowl covered in cloth and containing coins with the Hindu Swastika on them. She rattles this bowl over the groom’s head to drive away any evil eye and to remind him even after wedding he should remember his sister. His father’s sister-in-law puts a garland on him and gives him a bunch of flowers.
At the entrance, the bride’s mother receives the groom and his procession by performing the traditional ‘aarti’ for the groom and applies the vermilion mark ‘tikka’ on his forehead. The groom is made to step onto a low stool and the mother once again gives him a ceremonial welcome with the ‘aarti’ and vermilion and rice ‘tikka’ on his forehead. The bunch of flowers given by his aunt is exchanged for a decorated coconut with red thread.
Groom’s aunt presents the bride who at this time worships the shrine of Lord Ganesha, with the ‘kanya shelu’ consisting of a platter with a sari, some jewelry, pretty slippers and a ‘mangalsutra’, a red thread with black beads strung on it. With the sari draped around her shoulders and the ‘mangalsutra’ tied around her neck the bride is escorted to welcome the groom. After garlanding the groom she goes back to continue her worship of the Lord. Before entering the wedding canopy the groom breaks two pots, full of rice, placed on the ground by the bride’s mother.
’Lagna’, the wedding ceremony, begins with ‘varmala’ in which the bride is led by her maternal uncle to the altar where she garlands the groom and he recipro/cates it. The priest blesses the couple by applying ‘tikka’ on their foreheads.
A Patel girl looks stunning in her bridal costumes that include a very expensive silk sari heavily decorated with zari works and a chic matching blouse. The beautiful brightly colored sari is draped in the traditional Gujarati style. But the latest trend shows that more and more brides go for richly decorated, stylish and chic looking lehengas available in different shades. During weddings the bride is adorned with 22 carat gold jewelry from head to feet. She wears Mang-tika along the parting of her hair, a big circular nose-ring having a chain hooked into the hair, beautiful necklaces, gold and glass bangles, dangling earrings, ‘payal/anklets, toe-rings and bracelets. These gold pieces are very expensive and are embellished with precious gems or stones like diamonds. The groom is attired in the traditional ‘kurta-dhoti’, but the present trend is to go for the designer ‘kurta-pyjamas’. He also wears a gold chain and a ring.
The bride’s father performs the ‘kanyadaan’ by tying the hands of the couple together in a marital knot. ’hast medap’. The bride’s right hand is kept in the groom’s right hand and they together reach out over the sacred fire below that is not yet lighted. This way the bride’s father gives away the most precious gift, his daughter, to the groom in the belief that he will protect her till the end. Her mother takes a sacred thread called ‘Varmaala’ to join the couple by tying it across them such that it looks like a garland over their hands. After ‘Kanyadaan’ the ‘varmaala’ is put around the bride’s neck.
Chanting Vedic mantras, the priest lights the sacred fire around which the couple makes ‘mangal pheras’ or circumventions four times, three times the groom leads the bride and the last one the bride leads. A small tussle follows at the end of the fourth round to know who comes back to the seat first.

Now the newly weds take the ‘saptapadi’, seven steps around the fire taking a vow with each step. After the completion of the wedding ceremonies all bless the couple by showering rice on them.

Before the bride bids a tearful farewell to her parental house, relatives and friends, the priest conducts a small prayer for the decorated car and applies a ‘tikka’ to the hood and her mother breaks a coconut in front of the car for a safe journey for the couple up to her new house.

The Khatri community of Uttar Pradesh, a north Indian state, is part of the Kshatriya clan that originated in the Punjab. They conduct their weddings with all the traditional rites that may last all night. The ceremonies are elaborate and the ceremony known as ‘Bedi Lutna’ is their specialty in which the young cousins and other children plunder the wedding altar soon after the ceremony by removing all its adornments and toys.

Once an alliance is accepted between the families of the girl and boy, the bride, her parents and other close relatives go to the groom’s house with lot of gifts to confirm the alliance. The elder members from the groom’s family apply ‘Tilak’, a mark made with vermilion, on the groom’s forehead followed by fixing an auspicious date for the wedding. This engagement ceremony is known as ‘sagaai’.
In the ‘Godh Bharai’ ritual, held one or two days prior to the wedding, the groom’s people visit the bride’s house carrying gifts like jewelry, saris, cosmetics, accessories, silver, sweetmeats etc for the bride and the groom’s mother places silver platters containing all these gifts on her ‘godh’/lap. They also apply ‘tilak’ on her forehead.
On a day before the wedding the bride’s brother accompanied by other relatives goes to the bride’s house with gifts for him and his entire family and applies the ceremonial ‘tilak’ on the groom’s forehead followed by dancing and singing every day by members of the two families, particularly the youngsters, till the wedding day.
‘Kangana’ is an important ritual officiated by a Brahmin ‘pujari’ (priest). Two small bundles containing betel nuts, tamarind and tiny shells/cockles are tied to a red sacred thread called ‘mouli’ and blessed by the priest. These ‘kangans’/bracelets, a symbol of protection for all the wedding rites, are tied to the couple’s wrists and remain there till the end of all wedding rites.
A purely ladies’ function ‘mehendi’ or henna ceremony, held a day or two before the wedding has the professional henna artists making intricate designs on the palms and feet of the bride and the other ladies and girls by the application of henna paste in the midst of singing and dancing by the ladies present.
The ceremony ‘Seedhe Haath Tanni Kadai’ (the couple gets prepared for the wedding) is performed in both houses separately. The family members, one by one, touch the bride’s and groom’s toes, knees, shoulders and foreheads with ‘doob’, special blades of grass, after dipping it into mustard oil. In another preparation, a paste, ‘uptan’, made from chickpea flour, mustard oil, fresh milk curds and turmeric is applied on the faces, arms and feet of the couple after which they go for their regular baths.
In the ‘Chooda’ ceremony the bride’s maternal uncle (mama) and maternal aunt (mami) slips a set of cream and ivory bangles with inlay work on the bride’s wrists after a ‘puja’/prayer conducted by the priest and blessed by all. These days ivory ‘choodas’ are replaced by plastic or acrylic.

The ‘Vivah’ or marriage ceremonies are commenced with ‘Baraat’-the groom, attired in an off-white or cream color ‘sherwani suit, a head gear, ‘safa’ and a jeweled sword, a family heirloom fixed in his waistband, leaves for the wedding venue mounted on a lavishly decorated mare and accompanied by family members and close friends dancing to the tune of a live band. At the entrance of the venue the bride’s family gives him a warm welcome.
The UP Khatri bride is very charming either in a heavy Banaras silk sari decorated with beautiful zari works and a matching blouse or a heavily embroidered ‘lehenga choli, a full length ‘flowing flare’ skirt, blouse and a ‘dupatta’ the preferred colors being red, magenta and bright pink. She wears earrings, necklaces, bangles, armlets and anklets decorated with traditional ‘kundan works, i.e. uncut rubies, emeralds and diamonds set in gold.
The bride along with her close friends and cousins come to receive the groom and the ‘pujari’/priest performs a small ‘puja’ after which the couple exchanges garlands (jaimala ceremony). Then they enter the temporary ‘mandap’ or altar erected for the wedding ceremony and the bride too conducts the traditional ‘aarti’ for the groom.

Since in the UP Khatri weddings the wedding rites are performed only after midnight and may last till the early hours of the morning wedding dinner is served to the guests after the ‘jaimala ceremony. Only very close family relatives and friends stay there to witness the actual wedding rites.

The two officiating priests, one from each family, perform a special ‘puja’/prayer for the groom as he enters the altar. Numerous rituals are performed by the couple, their parents and close relatives. The main witness to the wedding, ‘Havan’ or the sacred fire is lit by the priest chanting Vedic mantras and he offers prayers to the fire for a long healthy, prosperous and happy life for the newly weds. The priest conducts these Vedic rites using fresh flowers, rice, pure butter or ‘ghee, sugar, grains and vermilion.

For one of the most important wedding rites, ‘Kanyadaan’, the bride with betel leaves, betel nuts, rice grains and one flower in her cupped hands stands facing the groom. The priest touches the couple’s foreheads with a ‘kalash, a pot containing water while the bride’s father touching her hands asks the groom whether he is prepared to accept her as his wife for which the groom, grasping her hands, promises to safeguard and give maximum care to her.

‘Gath Bandhan’ is the tying of the bride’s sari ‘pallu’ or ‘dupatta’/veil to the groom’s shawl/scarf which symbolizes the joining of the couple’s hearts and binding their families together in a lasting relationship. The bride and the groom take their marriage vows by circling the holy fire seven times while the priest recites the mantras and offers ‘samaghri’, a combination of herbs, pure butter and rice grains to the fire. After completing the seven ‘pheras’ the bride moves to the groom’s left side, the side very near to his heart.

‘Bari Palang’ is a unique custom in which the couple is taken to the room having the nuptial bed and they sit on it. After a brief prayer the bride, taking handfuls of rice throws it over her head looking straight. The ladies, who stand behind, try to collect as many rice grains as they can in their sari ‘pallus’ or ‘dupattas’. It is believed that good luck will favor the one who gathers the most. ‘Bedi lutana’ is another interesting ritual wherein the young cousins and children of the two families take away all the adornments and toys from the altar to their home. ‘Bedi lutana’ means plundering the ‘mandap’ or altar.

At the end of all the wedding ceremonies the parents of the newly weds hug and wish each other. At this time close to daylight, the bride is sent to the groom’s house. The next day morning the bride’s brother comes to the groom’s house to bring her, the groom and his close relatives sback to the bride’s parental house to take part in a sumptuous breakfast.

In the last ritual, ‘Vidaai’, the bride bids a tearful farewell to her parents, close relatives and friends all the while she is showered with flowers and gifts and arrives at her new house in a decorated car.

The natives of Coorg, Kodavas, are a martial race, living in the hilly regions of Western Ghats of Karnataka, a south Indian state. They are tall, fair, very handsome and sturdily built. They conduct their weddings in an entirely different manner without ‘havan’/sacred fire or ‘saptapadi’/seven steps as seen in most other Indian weddings. They worship their ancestors and respect elders and so the senior most members of this community play a significant role in the weddings. As such, there is no Brahmin priest to officiate the weddings.

In case, the horoscopes of the boy and the girl agree and the two families give their consent to the alliance an auspicious day is fixed for the betrothal ceremony. The betrothal is held in the bride’s house, attended by two elder members from the groom’s side or clan. If an astrologer is there, he fixes an auspicious day and time for the ‘muhurtha’, the most important wedding rite of ‘Kodavas’. He makes the ‘lagna patrika’, the marriage letter containing the details of the ‘muhurtha’ and gives to the two families.
For the betrothal, the ‘nellakki nadu baade’ or the central hall of the house, where ‘Lakshmi’, the Goddess of wealth, is supposed to reside, is cleaned and purified by sprinkling cow dung water all over. A ‘thaliyathakki bolcha’ (lighted oil lamp kept on a bell-metal plate with some rice grains strewn over) is placed in the central hall. Before this lamp the two families stand facing each other and the two elder members formalize the engagement by sealing the agreement with the assurance that the wedding will be conducted in accordance with traditional customs. The groom’s ‘aruva’, the elder member of his clan’, salutes the lamp folding his hands, signifying a pledge. He then puts five coins or a piece of jewelry for the bride on the sacred lamp.

On the day prior to the wedding, all the female members from the bride’s and groom’s clans help the cooks by cutting the vegetables for the feast that follows while the male members erect the ‘pandal’ or shed over the steps leading to the house. Banana stumps with clusters of fruit are tied to the posts of the ‘pandal’ which is further decorated with festoons of mango leaves and flowers. After these works, the bride and groom, separately in their homes, pray to the sacred lamp in the central hall and touch the feet of their parents and the elders for their blessings. When the villagers leave, the bride’s people fill boxes with her trousseau, such as vessels, money, jewelry, clothes etc.
On the wedding day morning, a washerman ties a pure white cloth under the ‘pandal’ that stretches up to the central hall of the house. Below the white canopy, at the exact point where the couple will sit for the ‘muhurtha’ (wedding rites) a red silk cloth is attached. From one corner of the silk cloth, a bunch of ripe bananas hangs, a coconut from the second, a cucumber from the third and three betel leaves from the fourth while areca nuts or areca flowers are suspended from the center of the silk cloth.
Very early on the wedding morning the groom is taken to ‘kanni kombare’, a sacred room where a lamp is kept, then to ‘kanni kamba’, a sacred pillar and to the central hall of the house. He sprinkles rice on the sacred lamps and salutes them and just salutes the pillar. These customary practices are performed by the couple before each and every important ritual. For his ritual shave, the groom goes to a barber who, applying milk on his face, shaves off his facial hair and a part of his forehead. Not even a single strand is allowed to fall on the floor; all the hair is kept in a plate containing milk. His ‘aruva’ or ‘bojakaara’/bestman leads him to his ritual bath wherein three ‘muthaides’ (married ladies) pour water on him. The groom is dressed with the help of the best man. He smears ‘Vibuthi’ (sacred ash) on his forehead and chewing betel leaves and areca nuts he walks towards the ‘muhurtha’ site while a live band plays music to announce the arrival of the groom.
A ‘Kodava groom wears a white ‘kuppya’, a long coat down to mid-calf on the top of which an ornamental robe is worn along with tight-fitting trousers known as churidar. A red brocaded ‘chele’ is tied around the waist in a bow and the ends of the sash hang over the left thigh gracefully. His head carries a brocaded white turban imparting a majestic look. He carries a stick known as ‘gajje thand’, decorated with silver bells and the best man holds an umbrella covered with a white cloth over the groom’s head.
As far for the bride, she, dressed in a silk sari and a long-sleeved blouse sits on a mat spread on the floor and a bangle seller slips bangles of various colors, such as red, green and black onto the bride’s wrists. All other rituals are the same for the bride also, only in the place of best man a ‘bojakarthi’ or bridesmaid’ helps her till she enters the ‘muhurtha’ site.
The Coorgi bride is seen in a traditional gorgeous sari worn in a unique, but elegant manner with the pleats behind and ‘pallu’ safely pinned above chest. A long-sleeved jacket with or without a close collar is worn along with the beautiful sari. She has a decorated veil or scarf over her head. The bridal sari is handed down from one generation to the next in the belief that it would bring good luck and prosperity. She wears a number of gold necklaces, long and short with beads or stones and decorated pendants around her neck, beautiful danglers on the ears and bangles on the wrists. Her intricately designed anklets are made of silver.
Before the arrival of the bride or groom at the ‘muhurtha’ site the ‘aruva’s (the elder member of the clan) wife lights the sacred lanp in the central hall and spreads 2-3 mats in the North-South direction while the washerman covers these mats with a carpet. Then the ‘aruva’s wife places a ‘mukkali’ (three-legged low stool) in the center of carpet and spreads a red cloth over it. Two more three-legged stools are kept on each side of the first one in the center. Plates made of silver or bell metal containing rice are placed on these stools and a ‘kindi’, a type of small metal vessel with a spout, filled with milk is placed over the rice on one of the low stools. On either side of the ‘muhurtha’ site two tall lighted brass lamps are placed.
The bride or groom with the bridesmaid or the best man makes three circles around the middle stool. Then the bride/groom standing behind the stool, sprinkles rice on it thrice and with both hands he/she touches it and raises them up to the forehead. He/she then steps over the stool with the right foot and sits on it. Now the Kodava guests, one by one, come to attend the wedding after washing their feet with water. On sides of the passage, leading to the ‘muhurtha’ site nine or more (multiples of three), one yard-long plantain tree stumps are tied vertically to small wooden stakes dug into the ground. Only a few selected guests, usually the maternal uncles of the bride/groom and some renowned ones who the family decides to honor are given the honor of cutting the plantain stumps, known as ‘Baale Birud’. The guests, before performing the ‘baale birud’, call out to the Gods and pray along with the villagers without turbans or headgears. The guest or his representative walks around the stumps three times and with the ‘odi katti’/knife gently taps the arrows made out of the bark and the flowers on the top. He then cuts three stumps, one by one, with one stroke after which he begins to dance merrily.
Separate ‘muhurtha’ ceremonies are held for the bride and the groom in their respective houses. The bride/groom sits on the three-legged stool, with a red cloth spread on her/his lap while the bestman sits slightly behind the groom on his right side and the bridesmaid stands behind the bride. The mother comes first to bless the bride/groom followed by two married ladies. Usually these ladies gift bride/groom with gold coins. They take a little rice from the plates kept on each side of the bride/groom and sprinkle the rice three times on her/his head repeating the entire process three times. After this, gifts are offered either in the form of cash or jewelry. The bride/groom places the gifts on the red cloth spread on the lap and afterwards puts them in to a box or tray kept nearby. Four men sing the wedding song during the ‘muhurtha’, by beating ‘dudis’/drums.
Several types of sumptuous meat dishes are served in the wedding feast and the bride and the groom are served their meals in the rooms they went soon after the ‘muhurtha’ along with two of their best friends, eating from the same plate of the bride and groom.
The special guests who performed the ‘baale birud’ are given a fitting farewell by the hosts by escorting them up to the spot where the stumps are cut, with the beating of the live band.
After the feast the groom along with his party, in a wedding procession, goes to the bride’s house to bring her to the in-law’s house. A girl/lady carrying a ‘poliya’ (reed basket with a lid) filled with food stuffs on her head, also accompanies this procession. At the plantain stumps, the head of the family offers the groom some advice and sees them off to the bride’s house. When the groom’s people reach the plantain stumps at the bride’s house three men go to the bride’s house to announce the arrival of the groom’s procession. A chosen few from the bride’s side with the wedding band rush to the plantain stumps to receive the procession. The bride’s family honors the members from the groom’s family by asking them to cut the plantain stumps and the groom is given a traditional welcome by a young girl washing the feet of the groom and the bestman with water. The groom’s entry to the bride’s house is marked by sprinkling rice on his head. The groom and the bestman are then escorted to the central hall and are made to sit there. The ‘aruva’s wife takes the ‘poliya’ basket from the girl’s head and keeps it below the sacred lamp in the central hall.
When the groom’s people finish their meal the bride and the groom sit below the canopy for the ritual ‘Dampathi Muhurtha’ where the groom sits first on the right side of the bride. The rituals held here are similar to the ones performed in the separate ‘muhurtha’ earlier. After this the groom sprinkles rice on her head and gives her milk in the ‘kindi’, and a small bag made of red silk, known as ‘cheela pana’, that contains minimum one gold, one silver and one copper coins-a symbolical representation of sharing his wealth his wife-followed by the exchange of garlands by the couple. Next they are taken to the kitchen and stand on each side of the threshold of the kitchen. Taking her right hand the groom escorts her to the central hall by crossing the threshold. At this time all the ‘sammands’/rights in the groom’s clan are bestowed upon the bride, i.e. legalizing the wedding.
The wedding procession prepares to return to the groom’s house taking the bride along with them. After all the customary rituals, one man and woman from each clan in the bride’s village join the procession to the groom’s house, where the bride’s family performs the ‘baale birud’, cutting the plantain stumps this time.

The couple is welcomed by showering rice on their walk up to the entrance of the groom’s house. Immediately the groom performs the usual sprinkling of rice and salutations to all the sacred lamps. The bride too showers rice on the lamp in the central hall and prays before it. Then she is asked to sit on a wooden bench built along the border of the inner courtyard of the central hall and she seeks the blessings of the elders by touching their feet.